1. Log in now to remove adverts - no adverts at all to registered members!

Off Topic The offical: Jokes THREAD

Discussion in 'Liverpool' started by Garlic Klopp, Jan 13, 2014.

Page 145 of 345
  1. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

    Joined:
    May 11, 2011
    Messages:
    110,568
    Likes Received:
    215,370
    please log in to view this image
     
    #2881
    kiwiqpr, Sep 20, 2018
  2. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

    Joined:
    May 11, 2011
    Messages:
    110,568
    Likes Received:
    215,370
    please log in to view this image
     
    #2882
    kiwiqpr, Sep 23, 2018
    Milk not bear jizz likes this.
  3. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

    Joined:
    May 11, 2011
    Messages:
    110,568
    Likes Received:
    215,370
    please log in to view this image
     
    #2883
    kiwiqpr, Sep 23, 2018
    organic red likes this.
  4. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

    Joined:
    May 11, 2011
    Messages:
    110,568
    Likes Received:
    215,370
    please log in to view this image
     
    #2884
    kiwiqpr, Sep 23, 2018
    Diego likes this.
  5. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

    Joined:
    May 11, 2011
    Messages:
    110,568
    Likes Received:
    215,370
    please log in to view this image
     
    #2885
    kiwiqpr, Sep 23, 2018
  6. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

    Joined:
    May 11, 2011
    Messages:
    110,568
    Likes Received:
    215,370
    please log in to view this image
     
    #2886
    kiwiqpr, Sep 23, 2018
  7. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

    Joined:
    May 11, 2011
    Messages:
    110,568
    Likes Received:
    215,370
    I've been having a problem with nuisance phone calls...
    The most common one seems to be, "You said you'd be home from the pub three hours ago!"
     
    #2887
    kiwiqpr, Sep 23, 2018
    THE FOOL, Milk not bear jizz and Diego like this.
  8. LuisDiazgamechanger

    LuisDiazgamechanger Dribbles

    Joined:
    May 31, 2011
    Messages:
    36,822
    Likes Received:
    6,719
    Funniest Goalkeeper Moment of the Year

     
    #2888
    LuisDiazgamechanger, Sep 24, 2018
    luvgonzo and Garlic Klopp like this.
  9. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

    Joined:
    May 11, 2011
    Messages:
    110,568
    Likes Received:
    215,370
    please log in to view this image
     
    #2889
    kiwiqpr, Sep 25, 2018
    Milk not bear jizz and organic red like this.
  10. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

    Joined:
    May 11, 2011
    Messages:
    110,568
    Likes Received:
    215,370
    Next time someone wants a vegan meal, serve them up a steak and tell them it's quorn.
    They're always saying "it's just like meat, you can't tell the difference"
    The proof of the quorn is in the eating.
     
    #2890
    kiwiqpr, Sep 27, 2018

  11. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

    Joined:
    May 11, 2011
    Messages:
    110,568
    Likes Received:
    215,370
    please log in to view this image
     
    #2891
    kiwiqpr, Sep 29, 2018
    Milk not bear jizz likes this.
  12. Zanjinho

    Zanjinho Boom!
    Forum Moderator

    Joined:
    Sep 10, 2014
    Messages:
    45,652
    Likes Received:
    28,027
    FB_IMG_1538220560692.jpg
     
    #2892
    Zanjinho, Sep 29, 2018
    THE FOOL, kiwiqpr and Garlic Klopp like this.
  13. Garlic Klopp

    Garlic Klopp Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 22, 2012
    Messages:
    16,367
    Likes Received:
    11,598
    please log in to view this image
     
    #2893
    Garlic Klopp, Oct 1, 2018
    THE FOOL and kiwiqpr like this.
  14. LuisDiazgamechanger

    LuisDiazgamechanger Dribbles

    Joined:
    May 31, 2011
    Messages:
    36,822
    Likes Received:
    6,719
    Dont fart in Harrods

    A lady walks into Harrods. She looks around, spots a beautiful diamond
    bracelet and walks over to inspect it. As she bends over to look more
    closely, she unexpectedly farts.
    Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone noticed
    her little woops and prays that a sales person was not anywhere near.
    As she turns around, her worst nightmare materialises in the form of
    a salesman standing right behind her - Good looking as well Cool as a cucumber, he displays all of the qualities one would expect
    of a professional in a store like Harrods.
    He politely greets the lady with, 'Good day, Madam. How may we help
    you today?
    Blushing and uncomfortable, but still hoping that the salesman
    somehow missed her little 'incident', she asks, 'what is the price of
    this lovely bracelet?'
    He answers, "Madam - if you farted just looking at it - you're going
    to **** yourself when I tell you the price!"
     
    #2894
    LuisDiazgamechanger, Oct 1, 2018
  15. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

    Joined:
    May 11, 2011
    Messages:
    110,568
    Likes Received:
    215,370
    The best thing about being a stoner is ordering pizza and being surprised when it shows up
     
    #2895
    kiwiqpr, Oct 1, 2018
  16. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

    Joined:
    May 11, 2011
    Messages:
    110,568
    Likes Received:
    215,370
     
    #2896
    kiwiqpr, Oct 3, 2018
  17. Red Hadron Collider

    Red Hadron Collider The Hammerhead

    Joined:
    Mar 2, 2011
    Messages:
    57,485
    Likes Received:
    9,843
    <laugh>
     
    #2897
    Red Hadron Collider, Oct 3, 2018
  18. Milk not bear jizz

    Milk not bear jizz Grasser-In-Chief

    Joined:
    Nov 12, 2013
    Messages:
    28,427
    Likes Received:
    10,110
    Screen-Shot-2018-07-10-at-13.22.00-1024x693.png
     
    #2898
    Milk not bear jizz, Oct 3, 2018
    THE FOOL and kiwiqpr like this.
  19. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

    Joined:
    May 11, 2011
    Messages:
    110,568
    Likes Received:
    215,370
    The bravery of Manchester university’s decision to ban clapping must be applauded.
     
    #2899
    kiwiqpr, Oct 3, 2018
  20. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

    Joined:
    May 11, 2011
    Messages:
    110,568
    Likes Received:
    215,370
    please log in to view this image
     
    #2900
    kiwiqpr, Oct 3, 2018
Page 145 of 345

Share This Page