O/T: and so it goes on, can we please stop bashing religion?

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It's not just the virgin thing I don't get tbh.

Christians seem to spend their entire life believing in Heaven but they've absolutely no idea what it'll be like.

Every suggestion I've heard sounds rank.

Dunno mate, everybody gets a mansion apparently. That'd be good for all of 5 minutes until you see that all your mates have got one and you've got **** all to brag about.
 
Half the fun of sex is the chase, finding some bird in a bar that you fancy your chances with then moving on to the next bird when she tells you no, until inevitably you go home with a ten pinter. The good old days.

I don't get the need for 40 of the dirty bitches though, they'll all look the same with their Burkhas on!

I'm sure they can do whatever you want :)

As for the chase, see AC/DC's "shot down in flames". A few dead certs wouldn't hurt...
 
Half the fun of sex is the chase, finding some bird in a bar that you fancy your chances with then moving on to the next bird when she tells you no, until inevitably you go home with a ten pinter. The good old days.

I don't get the need for 40 of the dirty bitches though, they'll all look the same with their Burkhas on!

Some cleric or other has calculated it to be 72 somehow plus a mansion and sherbet.

If you`ve got no physical body, presumably there is provision for allah to provide something to poke them with.
 
Some cleric or other has calculated it to be 72 somehow plus a mansion and sherbet.

If you`ve got no physical body, presumably there is provision for allah to provide something to poke them with.

Hahaha

72 seems fair, I'm gonna get busy making sure my mrs turns up at Allan's Snackbar with a pouch like a vintage golf bag, so she's not plucked by Allan, when the virgins run out, which they will.

The math appears to be flawed but let's never mind about that, because the rest seems plausible.
 
Hahaha

72 seems fair, I'm gonna get busy making sure my mrs turns up at Allan's Snackbar with a pouch like a vintage golf bag, so she's not plucked by Allan, when the virgins run out, which they will.

The math appears to be flawed but let's never mind about that, because the rest seems plausible.

That`s taken care of mate.

Regenerating hymens = endless supply.

They`ve got that one covered.
 
Not technically virgins then, they're just a bit refurbished. I was just off to convert as well, think I'll leave it now.

<laugh>

The thing is Terry, if your idea of heaven is a lovely sunny day, lazing by the side of a gurgling stream with a nice cold beer. It`s no good. You haven`t got a body. You can`t pick the glass up.

Similarly, you go to allahs place, you`ve got your mansion, loads of food and drink, 72 gorgeous lasses gagging for it and you discover you`ve got nee dick?

Sounds more like hell to me.
 
<laugh>

The thing is Terry, if your idea of heaven is a lovely sunny day, lazing by the side of a gurgling stream with a nice cold beer. It`s no good. You haven`t got a body. You can`t pick the glass up.

Similarly, you go to allahs place, you`ve got your mansion, loads of food and drink, 72 gorgeous lasses gagging for it and you discover you`ve got nee dick?

Sounds more like hell to me.

Yeah it's not really selling it to me either!

For some reason, I've always imagined 'heaven' to be very cloudy, and those gates we're told about, I don't see the point in them because they don't come with a fence so if Pete decides you can't come in, you can just walk round the gates and get in anyways.

Flawed I think is the word that best describes it, we're lacking details, I'm a details kind of person!
 
Yeah it's not really selling it to me either!

For some reason, I've always imagined 'heaven' to be very cloudy, and those gates we're told about, I don't see the point in them because they don't come with a fence so if Pete decides you can't come in, you can just walk round the gates and get in anyways.

Flawed I think is the word that best describes it, we're lacking details, I'm a details kind of person!

Don't even ****ing think about it, the loving God has thunderbolts and can turn you to stone.
 
Fuxake what are whimpering on about now?

Sid said 'I'm afraid I don't know what the f**k you're talking about'
I said you don't know what you're talking about so you have that in common.
It was just a bit of daft humour ffs, nowt to get all huffy about.

I didn't think it would need explaining ...... unlike many of your posts.

As Sid says they don't don't make sense.

I'm not being rude but I'd bet there's absolutely no one, on this board, who could explain what your point is ........ you haven't so far.

If anyone wants to correct me, fire away.
 
Don't even f**king think about it, the loving God has thunderbolts and can turn you to stone.

Lol. I'd imagine a thunderbolt could turn you to charcoal but not stone. See, if only they paid more attention to science when making up the stories they could have been far more believable. I might have a crack at writing one myself.
 
Lol. I'd imagine a thunderbolt could turn you to charcoal but not stone. See, if only they paid more attention to science when making up the stories they could have been far more believable. I might have a crack at writing one myself.

What are we on about here Terry? Scientific explanations for biblical peculiar happenings?
 
Lol. I'd imagine a thunderbolt could turn you to charcoal but not stone. See, if only they paid more attention to science when making up the stories they could have been far more believable. I might have a crack at writing one myself.

This thread will end up longer than the bible <laugh>

These 'religious' threads are always the same, people debate for days, put forward their arguments and no one changes their mind a fraction.

Usually funny though <ok>
 
This thread will end up longer than the bible <laugh>

These 'religious' threads are always the same, people debate for days, put forward their arguments and no one changes their mind a fraction.

Usually funny though <ok>

Entertaining as long as it doesn`t get too serious. I clear off when that happens, can`t be bothered with it.

It`s worth remembering though Smug, in a religion not far from here, our heads would have been off long before now.