1. Log in now to remove adverts - no adverts at all to registered members!

O/T: and so it goes on, can we please stop bashing religion?

Discussion in 'Sunderland' started by Shameless, May 30, 2014.

  1. Tel (they/them)

    Tel (they/them) Sucky’s Bailiff

    Joined:
    May 11, 2011
    Messages:
    61,295
    Likes Received:
    55,496
    Dunno mate, everybody gets a mansion apparently. That'd be good for all of 5 minutes until you see that all your mates have got one and you've got **** all to brag about.
     
    #181
  2. Smug in Boots

    Smug in Boots Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 27, 2011
    Messages:
    65,119
    Likes Received:
    151,543
    A fair few people reckon they'll have all the people they've loved around them ....... what a catfight that would be <laugh>
     
    #182
  3. Tel (they/them)

    Tel (they/them) Sucky’s Bailiff

    Joined:
    May 11, 2011
    Messages:
    61,295
    Likes Received:
    55,496
    That'll be awkward, I've told a fair few birds I've loved them to get them to pull their knickers down!
     
    #183
  4. Sidthemackem

    Sidthemackem Newcastle United 0-1 Cambridge United
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2011
    Messages:
    11,435
    Likes Received:
    5,137
    I'm sure they can do whatever you want :)

    As for the chase, see AC/DC's "shot down in flames". A few dead certs wouldn't hurt...
     
    #184
  5. grandpops

    grandpops Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 19, 2013
    Messages:
    10,573
    Likes Received:
    4,565
    Some cleric or other has calculated it to be 72 somehow plus a mansion and sherbet.

    If you`ve got no physical body, presumably there is provision for allah to provide something to poke them with.
     
    #185
  6. Tel (they/them)

    Tel (they/them) Sucky’s Bailiff

    Joined:
    May 11, 2011
    Messages:
    61,295
    Likes Received:
    55,496
    Hahaha

    72 seems fair, I'm gonna get busy making sure my mrs turns up at Allan's Snackbar with a pouch like a vintage golf bag, so she's not plucked by Allan, when the virgins run out, which they will.

    The math appears to be flawed but let's never mind about that, because the rest seems plausible.
     
    #186
  7. grandpops

    grandpops Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 19, 2013
    Messages:
    10,573
    Likes Received:
    4,565
    That`s taken care of mate.

    Regenerating hymens = endless supply.

    They`ve got that one covered.
     
    #187
  8. Smug in Boots

    Smug in Boots Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 27, 2011
    Messages:
    65,119
    Likes Received:
    151,543
    Aren't they the new electric cars, from Toyota, we keep hearing about?
     
    #188
  9. grandpops

    grandpops Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 19, 2013
    Messages:
    10,573
    Likes Received:
    4,565
    There`s going to be some seriously disappointed muslims if they are. <laugh>
     
    #189
  10. Tel (they/them)

    Tel (they/them) Sucky’s Bailiff

    Joined:
    May 11, 2011
    Messages:
    61,295
    Likes Received:
    55,496
    Not technically virgins then, they're just a bit refurbished. I was just off to convert as well, think I'll leave it now.
     
    #190

  11. Shameless

    Shameless Well hung member

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2011
    Messages:
    9,100
    Likes Received:
    341
    Fuxake what are whimpering on about now?
     
    #191
  12. grandpops

    grandpops Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 19, 2013
    Messages:
    10,573
    Likes Received:
    4,565
    <laugh>

    The thing is Terry, if your idea of heaven is a lovely sunny day, lazing by the side of a gurgling stream with a nice cold beer. It`s no good. You haven`t got a body. You can`t pick the glass up.

    Similarly, you go to allahs place, you`ve got your mansion, loads of food and drink, 72 gorgeous lasses gagging for it and you discover you`ve got nee dick?

    Sounds more like hell to me.
     
    #192
  13. Tel (they/them)

    Tel (they/them) Sucky’s Bailiff

    Joined:
    May 11, 2011
    Messages:
    61,295
    Likes Received:
    55,496
    Yeah it's not really selling it to me either!

    For some reason, I've always imagined 'heaven' to be very cloudy, and those gates we're told about, I don't see the point in them because they don't come with a fence so if Pete decides you can't come in, you can just walk round the gates and get in anyways.

    Flawed I think is the word that best describes it, we're lacking details, I'm a details kind of person!
     
    #193
  14. Shameless

    Shameless Well hung member

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2011
    Messages:
    9,100
    Likes Received:
    341
    Don't even ****ing think about it, the loving God has thunderbolts and can turn you to stone.
     
    #194
  15. Deletion Requested1

    Deletion Requested1 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 31, 2011
    Messages:
    5,226
    Likes Received:
    3,625
    I shagged a virgin once then I realised she was wearing tights
     
    #195
  16. Smug in Boots

    Smug in Boots Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 27, 2011
    Messages:
    65,119
    Likes Received:
    151,543
    Sid said 'I'm afraid I don't know what the f**k you're talking about'
    I said you don't know what you're talking about so you have that in common.
    It was just a bit of daft humour ffs, nowt to get all huffy about.

    I didn't think it would need explaining ...... unlike many of your posts.

    As Sid says they don't don't make sense.

    I'm not being rude but I'd bet there's absolutely no one, on this board, who could explain what your point is ........ you haven't so far.

    If anyone wants to correct me, fire away.
     
    #196
  17. Tel (they/them)

    Tel (they/them) Sucky’s Bailiff

    Joined:
    May 11, 2011
    Messages:
    61,295
    Likes Received:
    55,496
    Lol. I'd imagine a thunderbolt could turn you to charcoal but not stone. See, if only they paid more attention to science when making up the stories they could have been far more believable. I might have a crack at writing one myself.
     
    #197
  18. grandpops

    grandpops Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 19, 2013
    Messages:
    10,573
    Likes Received:
    4,565
    What are we on about here Terry? Scientific explanations for biblical peculiar happenings?
     
    #198
  19. Smug in Boots

    Smug in Boots Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 27, 2011
    Messages:
    65,119
    Likes Received:
    151,543
    This thread will end up longer than the bible <laugh>

    These 'religious' threads are always the same, people debate for days, put forward their arguments and no one changes their mind a fraction.

    Usually funny though <ok>
     
    #199
  20. grandpops

    grandpops Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 19, 2013
    Messages:
    10,573
    Likes Received:
    4,565
    Entertaining as long as it doesn`t get too serious. I clear off when that happens, can`t be bothered with it.

    It`s worth remembering though Smug, in a religion not far from here, our heads would have been off long before now.
     
    #200

Share This Page