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Discussion in 'Barnsley' started by Didley Squat, Sep 16, 2017.
Slap and tickle
Scratch and rub.
Itch and scrub
See you tomorrow at the altar Rev'd.....
Sorry ole chap, got stuck at the bar!
Well that went well !! I took the service in your absence, and told the congregation the story of the farmer and the three whippets. They believed every word, and the donations totalled over $70. After expenses were deducted, that leaves $15 for the Church - not bad eh ?!
l could’ve got Tony Blair cheaper !
Even Trump offered to pop in for a free game of golf.
I want to see the church books!
Is the church open for business on Easter Sunday, Rev'd ?
Come fourth, people.
The Reverend talks everybody’s language!
The Holy Water is being served, hic!
Bugger, I only came fifth........
Try the brothel next door, first serve, first come.
Hope Easter Sunday's sermon will be good
It was brilliant, well, a little bit sloshed..... hic.
Church takings are up so bonuses will be paid to all church staff.
It's all a bit Greek to me !...........Can you pay me in Drachma please ?
I’ve just posted it as we speak.
It’s in the mail!
Can you get it to me by Thursday, as I've got a dead cert running in the 2.30 at Chepstow, so need the money as the betting stake ?
Probably got more chance of winning at the races than getting a cheque in the mail.
Sorry to say, I can't make church on Sunday due to a total lack of cash to pay for transportation there and back
All good Woops, let me transfer money from Kiwis account, now.
Ok, that’s done.
Payment made and Kiwi will be none the wiser.
See you there!
We’ll be having garage sale after the service.
Bring your Kiwi cash!
That's mighty fine of you Rev'd - I'll be there first thing