Off Topic Jokes thread

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  • A couple was on their honeymoon, lying in bed, about ready to consummate their marriage, when the new bride says to the husband, "I have a confession to make, I"m not a virgin."The husband replies, "That"s no big thing in this day and age."
  • The wife continues, "Yeah, I"ve been with one guy."
  • "Oh yeah? Who was the guy?"
  • "Tiger Woods."
  • "Tiger Woods, the golfer?"
  • "Yeah.""Well, he"s rich, famous and handsome. I can see why you went to bed with him."
  • The husband and wife then make passionate love.When they are done, the husband gets up and walks to the telephone.
  • "What are you doing?" asks the wife.
  • The husband says, "I"m hungry, I was going to call room service and get something to eat."
  • "Tiger wouldn"t do that."
  • "Oh yeah? What would Tiger do?"
  • "He"d come back to bed and do it a second time."T
  • he husband puts down the phone and goes back to bed to make love a second time.When they finish, he gets up and goes over to the phone.
  • "Now what are you doing?" she asks.
  • The husband says, "I"m still hungry so I was going to get room service to get something to eat."
  • "Tiger wouldn"t do that.""Oh yeah? What would Tiger do?"
  • "He"d come back to bed and do it again."The guy slams down the phone, goes back to bed, and makes love one more time
  • .When they finish he"s tired and beat. He drags himself over to the phone and starts to dial.
  • The wife asks, "Are you calling room service?"
  • "No! I"m calling Tiger Woods, to find out what the par is for this damn hole."
 
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