Off Topic And Now for Something Completely Different

We are all of us in the gutter....

 

Hand ball

 

**** story though...

 

Is the sequel to Piddler on the Roof?

 

A shat on a hot tin roof?

 

FTFY. <OK>

 

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He can’t have had a great morning shower.

 

Did it happen in France or can't you spell properly ?

 

si, pero no... pero, no se.

 

This is good, bloody Chinese'll knock off anything!

https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p07m7g56

 

I take excetion to that, is Stranczek an English name?

 

Shopping for shoes?
On a vegan diet?

https://www.heydudeshoes.com/collections/uomo/products/farty

 

Look up 'odious ****' in the OED and there's no definition, just a picture of Roy Keane.

 

http://www.ladbible.com/entertainme...-most-shocking-naked-attraction-ever-20190905

[ the link has a video with it be warned !]

Fifty-Seven-Year-Old Chorister Doesn't Hold Back In Most Shocking Naked Attraction Ever

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REBECCA SHEPHERD in ENTERTAINMENT
Last updated 13:41, Thursday 05 September 2019 BST

Naked Attraction can get pretty weird at the best of times but one thing's for sure: you always know you're in for a treat.

But there's a treat and then there's a 57-year-old uninhibited practising Christian called Judith who uttered the words: "God, what a cock." She went on to speculate about 'nosing around the soft pubic hair'.

I think I can confidently say that the production team were in their element for this episode, which aired last week.

The squad at Channel 4 were evidently rubbing their hands together when they came across this eight to 11-inch loving goldmine from Nuneaton, Warwickshire. Her words, not mine.

The choir-going carer appeared on the show to find some naked love (just like Adam and Eve, she says) and she confessed from the outset to having 'no inhibitions'.

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Judith said that missing out on sex is a 'waste' because she's got a 'nice vagina'. Credit: Channel 4/Naked Attraction
Making a beeline for the well-endowed man in the pink box Judith said: "It is [big]. Well, I can take that." We'll take your word for it.

When host Anna Richardson asked how big she likes 'it' she explained: "I would say... eight to eleven inches."

In a bid to horrify the nation (presumably), she went on: "I do need to look at feet as well, actually. I love feet, I love to feel somebody's toes round my pussy, or kitty. I find it very sexual."

Wow. Judith really is the gift that keeps on giving, isn't she? She left us all, and Anna, completely speechless.

Moving swiftly on to the blue box, painting a picture for us, Anna asked: "Do you like to see the helmet just popping out the foreskin like that?" Course she does.

Judith responded: "Oh I do. I find it so sexual, yeah." We're noticing a running theme here.

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Judith began to sing a hymn for the lucky fellas. Credit: Channel 4/Naked Attraction
After visiting the orange box that was home to a man with a 'chode' that Judith imagined extended 'really, really well,' (shock) she went on to play the piano and sing a hymn for the guys. Just when we thought things couldn't get any weirder.

And, as expected, the Twittersphere went wild. One person summed the whole thing up perfectly, writing: "I'm fairly sure that someone laced my tea with LSD, because I've just seen five naked men dance to The Lord is my Shepherd, sung by Judith as she hammered away on an organ #NakedAttraction".

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Siobhan@deathvoices_

Judith from Naked Attraction is an icon of our time and I won’t hear any different

Another said: "I bloody love the show, thought I couldn't ever be shocked until old Judith!" She's certainly a people pleaser.

This unique fairytale did have a happy ending as well, because Judith ended up paired with business manager Doug who, upon tasting her Victoria sponge (yep, that happened too) said: "I bet you taste beautiful".

The pair shared a few cheeky, and very awkward smooches as they walked off set together with Anna Richardson saying: "Oh my God." Our thoughts exactly.