Chatting up women...

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jOkEr said:
Ok, just to appease our religious friends on this board, here's some religious-style chat up lines...

◦Did it hurt? (Did what hurt?) When you fell from heaven?

◦Do you know the difference between making out and a sermon? (No?) Wanna go to church with me?

◦Have you ever tried praying at a drive in movie before?

◦If Eve was tempted by an apple than you must be my fruit.

◦God was just showing off when He made you.

◦Do you think "ask, and it shall be given you" is to be taken literally?

◦Do you need help carrying your bible? It looks heavy.

◦I don't speak in tongues, but I kiss that way!

◦[look at the person's shirt label] "Just as i thought ... made in heaven."

◦Are you religious? (Yes) Good, well I am the answer to your prayers.
Click to expand...

Another one could be:

'God has predetermined that both you and I will wake up satisfied, but has given us the free will to decide how it comes about. Fancy a ****?'
 
I am ****ing ****e at chatting up women but I think that is down to the fact that I am incredibly shy and get really nervous when I am talking to a woman I like.

Cue the slew of comments making fun of me <doh>
 
Women have heard all these chat up lines hundreds of times before

The best advice is really to stand out from other men. If a woman is used to men surrounding her, giving her compliments and buying her drinks (which is the case for any remotely attractive woman), do the opposite.
 
Sam Axe said:
I am ****ing ****e at chatting up women but I think that is down to the fact that I am incredibly shy and get really nervous when I am talking to a woman I like.

Cue the slew of comments making fun of me <doh>
Click to expand...

I'm the same, I blame it on two things:
Going to an all boys' school.
Me ma making the most hideously embarrassing comments whenever I was anywhere near a girl. "I don't mind if you kiss as long as you don't use tongues" was a good one in front of my girlfriend aged 12.
 
stopmeandslapme said:
I'm the same, I blame it on two things:
Going to an all boys' school.
Me ma making the most hideously embarrassing comments whenever I was anywhere near a girl. "I don't mind if you kiss as long as you don't use tongues" was a good one in front of my girlfriend aged 12.
Click to expand...

Yeah those things certainly didn't help my cause either
 
stopmeandslapme said:
I'm the same, I blame it on two things:
Going to an all boys' school.
Me ma making the most hideously embarrassing comments whenever I was anywhere near a girl. "I don't mind if you kiss as long as you don't use tongues" was a good one in front of my girlfriend aged 12.
Click to expand...

Please tell me you were the same age....<yikes>
 
[video=youtube;f26-y523wIs]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f26-y523wIs[/video]

Howay yer buggers everybody get doon! Friday neet! Wer ganin' doon the toon!

Friday neet...Friday neet...Friday neet...!!
<laugh><laugh>
 
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