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Chatting up women...

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by Hugh Briss, Nov 1, 2011.

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  1. Treat Williams

    Treat Williams Well-Known Member

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    Another one could be:

    'God has predetermined that both you and I will wake up satisfied, but has given us the free will to decide how it comes about. Fancy a ****?'
     
    #21
    Treat Williams, Nov 1, 2011
  2. Sam Axe

    Sam Axe Active Member

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    I am ****ing ****e at chatting up women but I think that is down to the fact that I am incredibly shy and get really nervous when I am talking to a woman I like.

    Cue the slew of comments making fun of me <doh>
     
    #22
    Sam Axe, Nov 1, 2011
  3. Mahmoud Ahmadinejad

    Mahmoud Ahmadinejad Well-Known Member

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    Women have heard all these chat up lines hundreds of times before

    The best advice is really to stand out from other men. If a woman is used to men surrounding her, giving her compliments and buying her drinks (which is the case for any remotely attractive woman), do the opposite.
     
    #23
    Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, Nov 1, 2011
  4. Hugh Briss

    Hugh Briss Well-Known Member

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    You get turned down quite a bit, don't you? <whistle>...

    All women are different - some like to be chased aggressively whilst others prefer gentle persuasion.

    Of course there is always the rohypnol route that 'StereoTypist' uses.
     
    #24
    Hugh Briss, Nov 1, 2011
  5. Mahmoud Ahmadinejad

    Mahmoud Ahmadinejad Well-Known Member

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    Yeah I'm sure going up to a woman and coming out with a chat up line about having children works
     
    #25
    Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, Nov 1, 2011
  6. stopmeandslapme

    stopmeandslapme Well-Known Member

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    I'm the same, I blame it on two things:
    Going to an all boys' school.
    Me ma making the most hideously embarrassing comments whenever I was anywhere near a girl. "I don't mind if you kiss as long as you don't use tongues" was a good one in front of my girlfriend aged 12.
     
    #26
    stopmeandslapme, Nov 1, 2011
  7. Kyle?

    Kyle? New Member

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    Here's one not to use

    "If i were a serial rapist, you'd definitely be one of my victims"
     
    #27
    Kyle?, Nov 1, 2011
  8. stopmeandslapme

    stopmeandslapme Well-Known Member

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    One from Sid the Sexist:
    You don't sweat much for a fat lass.
     
    #28
    stopmeandslapme, Nov 1, 2011
  9. Hugh Briss

    Hugh Briss Well-Known Member

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    <laugh> ...Sid is a legend!

    "Do you want to talk about the weather? - wether you're gonna suck me cock the night!"

    "Do ya like jewellry? - suck me cock, it's a gem!"

    <laugh>
     
    #29
    Hugh Briss, Nov 1, 2011
  10. Sam Axe

    Sam Axe Active Member

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    Yeah those things certainly didn't help my cause either
     
    #30
    Sam Axe, Nov 1, 2011

  11. Alf Hooker

    Alf Hooker Well-Known Member

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    please log in to view this image
     
    #31
    Alf Hooker, Nov 1, 2011
  12. ncgandy

    ncgandy Well-Known Member

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    Please tell me you were the same age....<yikes>
     
    #32
    ncgandy, Nov 1, 2011
  13. Alf Hooker

    Alf Hooker Well-Known Member

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    <laugh>
     
    #33
    Alf Hooker, Nov 1, 2011
  14. Hornette_TID

    Hornette_TID Well-Known Member
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    i've never tried. Sorry ;)
     
    #34
    Hornette_TID, Nov 2, 2011
  15. SUPERNORWICH 23

    SUPERNORWICH 23 SUPERNORWICH

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    You are a cock man then?
     
    #35
    SUPERNORWICH 23, Nov 2, 2011
  16. East Stand

    East Stand Active Member

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    [video=youtube;f26-y523wIs]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f26-y523wIs[/video]

    Howay yer buggers everybody get doon! Friday neet! Wer ganin' doon the toon!

    Friday neet...Friday neet...Friday neet...!!
    <laugh><laugh>
     
    #36
    East Stand, Nov 2, 2011
  17. Hornette_TID

    Hornette_TID Well-Known Member
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    er...no..i'm a cock woman...
     
    #37
    Hornette_TID, Nov 2, 2011
  18. ncgandy

    ncgandy Well-Known Member

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    Good for you! <ok>
     
    #38
    ncgandy, Nov 2, 2011
  19. SUPERNORWICH 23

    SUPERNORWICH 23 SUPERNORWICH

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    Are you female?
     
    #39
    SUPERNORWICH 23, Nov 2, 2011
  20. Hornette_TID

    Hornette_TID Well-Known Member
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    <laugh> yes...it's a very camp avatar if i'm not!
     
    #40
    Hornette_TID, Nov 2, 2011
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