Wish all parishioners were as keen as you are Woops. I haven’t seen Sans in church since he was knee high to a grass hopper!
Dearly Beloved, I bring with me some very sad news. The church has been living on borrowed time. The lack of parishioners are drained the once flourish funds of Reverend Didley Squat to such an extent, l have to pass in purchasing gin every second week. Unless there is a saint with plenty of coin who can prop up the Reverend Didleys drinking... l mean, building fund, to pay the weekly expenses to run this church, this church will close down within a week! Please act now! GOFUNDTHEREV-1800
That's shocking news Rev'd !! Fortunately I have just won the Nigerian Lottery, something in the region of $30 million, according to Mr Umbongo the organiser. I'll lend you a couple of quid when the cheque comes through
The finance company shut it down. Don’t worry, Reverend Squat is starting up a new church next to the house of ill repute. It called, Squats House of Ho’s. First served, first come!
That’s great to hear, Woops. We will be having an open air service. The paddock next to the public toilets is our new church without a church, if you know what l mean. Fresh air aplenty and if it’s not so fresh, you can always go to the ****ter next door!
Yes, it was great wasn’t it Woops. Plenty of air, happy parishioners and big donations! What more could we want?