Troll a Stranger

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I've just replied to a phony email. I told them that it was a federally controlled computer, and i now have their IP adress, and will take further action unless they pay me $2000. So i'm trying to out-phony the phonies.
 
Ark at this ****ing amateur -

You: bello

Stranger: jello

You: bo bare boo?

Stranger: lo lare loo!

You: bime brian bedonde

Your conversational partner has disconnected.
 
would you touch me?
Stranger: shake hands maybe
You: :( not even bell touch...
Stranger: i wouldnt touch yo dick if that what u impying
You: why man?
Stranger: cuz i dont like man dingo

<laugh>
 
Stranger: lookin for a little slut to send me pics
You: i'm a girl
Stranger: asl?
You: 18, liverpool. Girl obviously...
Stranger: ha
Stranger: pics?
You: ?
You: what x
You: yes
You: i have a modeling site
Stranger: really?
You: yep
You: it's www.****offandgetalife.com/yourdeadnan
Stranger: hahahahahahaha
Stranger: that was almost funny
You: cool story bro
Stranger: tell it again
You: can't you read above you dumb ****er?
Stranger: shut the **** up
You: you
You: nigga face
Stranger: wow
Stranger: turning to racism
You: why not?
Stranger: very cool
You: BTW where you from?
Stranger: because we arent in the 1940s anymore
You: we are in liverpool
You: its a right shed

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

What a prick.
 
Stranger: hey

Stranger: asl?

You: hey

You: asl?

Stranger: u first

You: u first

Stranger: i asked first

You: i asked first

Stranger: go look i asked first

You: go look i asked first

Stranger: fine ill go first

Stranger: 19 f usa

You: fine ill go first

You: 19 f usa

Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Click to expand...

Proof Yanks are thick?

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: BRAZIL HERE

You: COLUMBIA HERE

You: So how is Brazil brother?

Stranger: i'm girl haha

You: Girls are allowed on computers in Brazil? This is fascinating.

You: Hello? Misses lady are you there?

Stranger: WE'RE NORMAL PEOPLES, AND WE'RE NOT LIVE IN THE FLOREST, WE'RE LIVE IN A COUNTRY HOW EVERYBODY IN THIS WORLD OK? I HATE IT.

Stranger: bye

Stranger: I HATE YOU

You: Slut.

Stranger: ASOFIHASIOHF **** MOTHER **** ASHOFOIAE

Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Click to expand...

She was mad.

Stranger: Hey. I'm an 18 year old guy looking for a nice girl who's willing to send me pictures of their body so that I can blow off some steam... If you don't like it, leave.

Go ahead and call me a pervert, but I'm being honest and straightforward here. I'm not a pervert, just horny, and regular porn is just boring.

You: RAH RAH AH AH AH ROH MA OOH LA LA GA GAAAAH GA GA GA GA.

Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Click to expand...

Short but sweet.
 
How ****ing rude -

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: hello ****
Your conversational partner has disconnected
 
****ing cocktease -

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: dont be shy!
Stranger: LETS HAVE SOME FUN !
You: show us your pie!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
 
Right then I'm pissed up now and this is addictive as **** -

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: hi therr, are you normal?
Stranger: yes. yes i am :D
You: pffft
You have disconnected

I'm ****ing off to bed
 
Longest and best one yet. if a little disturbing.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: hi
Stranger: Asl
You: wait. can you help me?
Stranger: Help u how
You: I have a problem with my 8 year old son...
Stranger: Wats the problem
You: He wont for the life of him suck on my cock! I mean I'm his father so why the hell not?!
You: hello?
Stranger: Maybe cause he's ur son
You: But I'm his father. Why wouldn't he please me? After all he did come out of my cock so it would hurt for him to feel the rim once again.
Stranger: Um cause sons usually don't suck their dads dicks
You: Well my Daughter started from a young age. Instead of her moms nipple it was always my bellend...
Stranger: Well that's kinda messed up
You: Shut up, you don't understand.
Stranger: Then explain it to me
You: Why? You clearly think my son/daughter sucking their FATHERS cock is wrong! You sir are in the wrong here.
Stranger: Explain
Stranger: Btw in a female
You: Well would you like your son to penetrate you?
Stranger: Not really
You: Why not? If you were washing your lads penis wouldn't you get the urge to give him a sly handjob?
Stranger: Not really y do u
You: Of course.
Stranger: Do u penatrate ur daughter
You: No because I would possibly kill her. She'a 5. BUT I do get my son and daughter to fiddle around with each other, you know a little finger here ect.
Stranger: And wat does ur wife think about that
You: I murdered her a while back! She sadly didn't agree and threatened to go to the police.
Stranger: Um r u serious
You: I'm not a lying person. This is the truth, I swear to you.
Stranger: If u killed her how so u still hav ur kids
Stranger: And not in jail
You: No-ones knows obviously. I threw her in the sea and haven't spoke about it since.
Stranger: Wouldn't people notice
You: I told people we split up and she went back to Bangkok and wanted nothing to do with the kids.
Stranger: where r u from
You: England
Stranger: Oh
You: ?
Stranger: So how old r u
You: 32
Stranger: Do u hav a big dick
You: around 3 inches on hard. Pretty big I must admit.
You: My kids love it!
Stranger: Three inches long?
You: Yes...
Stranger: That's not big
You: Yes it is. Don't ****ing chat ****.
You: It's bigger than my 8 year old sons, so yes. It's large.
Stranger: 6 is big
Stranger: I'd hope so
You: 6 inch is abnormal!
Stranger: No
Stranger: It's normal in america
You: And the UK. I'm not black rememebr
Stranger: I've never been with a black guy
You: Racist.
You: PS - You still haven't helped me with my problem...
Stranger: I'm black
You: You're black and have never ****ed a black?
Stranger: Reward ir son if he dose it
Stranger: Nope
You: How old are you?
Stranger: 14
You: You're slighty old for me.
You: I **** girls from around the age of 2 months - 10 years old.
Stranger: Ok?
Stranger: Y do u **** young girls
You: why not?
Stranger: Wat do u like about it
You: The tight pussy around my throbbing 3 inch penis. Unbelievable.
Stranger: I hav a tight pussy
You: I want pics
Stranger: But I'm too old for u
You: I like to **** over older women, just not have sex with them.
Stranger: Oh
Stranger: Well ur too young for me
You: why?
You: I'm 32
Stranger: I give bjs to men 35 and older
You: Are you taking the piss out of me?
You: YOU THINK THIS IS ALL ONE JOKE?!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
 
Saddler said:
Longest and best one yet. if a little disturbing.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: hi
Stranger: Asl
You: wait. can you help me?
Stranger: Help u how
You: I have a problem with my 8 year old son...
Stranger: Wats the problem
You: He wont for the life of him suck on my cock! I mean I'm his father so why the hell not?!
You: hello?
Stranger: Maybe cause he's ur son
You: But I'm his father. Why wouldn't he please me? After all he did come out of my cock so it would hurt for him to feel the rim once again.
Stranger: Um cause sons usually don't suck their dads dicks
You: Well my Daughter started from a young age. Instead of her moms nipple it was always my bellend...
Stranger: Well that's kinda messed up
You: Shut up, you don't understand.
Stranger: Then explain it to me
You: Why? You clearly think my son/daughter sucking their FATHERS cock is wrong! You sir are in the wrong here.
Stranger: Explain
Stranger: Btw in a female
You: Well would you like your son to penetrate you?
Stranger: Not really
You: Why not? If you were washing your lads penis wouldn't you get the urge to give him a sly handjob?
Stranger: Not really y do u
You: Of course.
Stranger: Do u penatrate ur daughter
You: No because I would possibly kill her. She'a 5. BUT I do get my son and daughter to fiddle around with each other, you know a little finger here ect.
Stranger: And wat does ur wife think about that
You: I murdered her a while back! She sadly didn't agree and threatened to go to the police.
Stranger: Um r u serious
You: I'm not a lying person. This is the truth, I swear to you.
Stranger: If u killed her how so u still hav ur kids
Stranger: And not in jail
You: No-ones knows obviously. I threw her in the sea and haven't spoke about it since.
Stranger: Wouldn't people notice
You: I told people we split up and she went back to Bangkok and wanted nothing to do with the kids.
Stranger: where r u from
You: England
Stranger: Oh
You: ?
Stranger: So how old r u
You: 32
Stranger: Do u hav a big dick
You: around 3 inches on hard. Pretty big I must admit.
You: My kids love it!
Stranger: Three inches long?
You: Yes...
Stranger: That's not big
You: Yes it is. Don't ****ing chat ****.
You: It's bigger than my 8 year old sons, so yes. It's large.
Stranger: 6 is big
Stranger: I'd hope so
You: 6 inch is abnormal!
Stranger: No
Stranger: It's normal in america
You: And the UK. I'm not black rememebr
Stranger: I've never been with a black guy
You: Racist.
You: PS - You still haven't helped me with my problem...
Stranger: I'm black
You: You're black and have never ****ed a black?
Stranger: Reward ir son if he dose it
Stranger: Nope
You: How old are you?
Stranger: 14
You: You're slighty old for me.
You: I **** girls from around the age of 2 months - 10 years old.
Stranger: Ok?
Stranger: Y do u **** young girls
You: why not?
Stranger: Wat do u like about it
You: The tight pussy around my throbbing 3 inch penis. Unbelievable.
Stranger: I hav a tight pussy
You: I want pics
Stranger: But I'm too old for u
You: I like to **** over older women, just not have sex with them.
Stranger: Oh
Stranger: Well ur too young for me
You: why?
You: I'm 32
Stranger: I give bjs to men 35 and older
You: Are you taking the piss out of me?
You: YOU THINK THIS IS ALL ONE JOKE?!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Click to expand...

<laugh> That is quality. Best one yet
 
Natchrawldry said:
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You: *smiles back but i appear to have a bit of cabbage on my teeth from last nights dinner

Stranger: "Debbie, you have something in your tooth" I say smiling at her

You: "yeah that's probably a bit of cabbage from last nights dinner"

Stranger: "oh ok" I smile, she gets out the cabbage and looks really hot stood in the hair dressers, "You look great today Debs"

You: "thanks, been feeling a bit lousy lately though..."

Stranger: "Really, why??" I Ask her as we stand in the small hair dressers, I step next to her and smile

You: "i've lost a bit of focus in my life recently, not606 isn't what it used to be" *sad face*

Stranger: I walk to her and hug her tight, "I am sure you will be fine Debs"

You: "i suppose so, it's just that i don't know how much more i can take anymore, i feel like my life is ebbing away, all this talk of who's who is making me lose the will to live"

Stranger: "Debbie, cmon, you are a great person, is there anything I can do to cheer you up?" I ask in the hug

You: "you could ask Mick to have a word with them?"

Stranger: "How about I cheer you up in a slightly different way" I lean foward and kiss her lips softly

You: "**** me that's a bit forward isn't it you ginger ****? i come on here to take the piss and then you ****ing force neck me. for ****s sake"

Stranger: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA... thats funny

You: cheers mate, btw I'm actually a builder from Bristol in my 40's but we can carry on if you like. maybe take things a bit slower?

Your conversational partner has disconnected
Click to expand...

That's ****ing sensational
 
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