Troll a Stranger
- Thread starter Kim Jong Il
- Start date
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You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: howdy
Stranger: Hiya
Stranger: Asl?
You: Hair pie or balls across the nose?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Shortest conversatino ever!
You: howdy
Stranger: Hiya
Stranger: Asl?
You: Hair pie or balls across the nose?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Shortest conversatino ever!
A
Amnesiac
Guest
You: hi
You: 20, f, uk
Stranger: 18 m turkey
Stranger:
You: cool
You: want to drink my vaginal fluids out of a cup made from the skull of a Welshman?
Stranger: yea
Stranger: How?
You: hastily and messily preferably
You: can i **** on your chest and smear it across your torso with my big pink dildo?
Stranger: do you have a msn adress
Stranger: ?
You: no do you?
You: would i be able to show you how i spread my legs wide and insert numerous small pets and garden ornaments into my cavernous flange?
Your conversational partner has disconnected
I think the zoophilia pushed him over the edge
I think the zoophilia pushed him over the edge
Might have to try some zoophilia later.
But at the moment being part of the FBI Cyber Marine Division is way to much fun 
Longest one ever?
Stranger: hey
You: Dick and Dom in da bungalow
You: hello
Stranger: wow
You: wow what???
Stranger: wow
You: don't wow me without due cause!!!
Stranger: wowww
You: or wowww me
You: Wanna see my schlong?
Stranger: ok
You: I bet you do
Stranger: no i dont sorry
Stranger: not hard to come by
You: lmao i eat dead people
You: i mean see
You: i see dead people
You: i swear i don't perform crude sex acts on them
You: honest
Stranger: its only necrophillia if they have a body
You: exactly
You: you know the score. wanna meet up for a rapey death meeting?
Stranger: not today
You: k...
Stranger: k
You: nobody ever says yes
You:
Stranger: thats surprising
You: i'm a registered sex offender you know
Stranger: i do now
You: i stole maddie mccann, mutilated her genitals and ate her pudenda
You: those little nipples were like piggie pork scratchings
Stranger: never met her
You: oh
You: you missed out
You: i filled her with my bechamel sauce
You: until it flowed from her eyelids instead of tears.
You: tears if pain
You: when i sliced her up whilst she was still alive
Stranger: i htink im going to get a cat
Stranger: what do you think
Stranger: cat or dog
Stranger: cats **** in the house
Stranger: and dogs are more work
You: dogs are tighter, so they make you came more quickly
Stranger: cant decide
Stranger: unfortunatly i dont have a penis
You: cats are ****
Stranger: so there goes that arguement
Stranger: i mean i could get a strapon
You: I had a feeling you were a woman
Stranger: good feeling
You: you could peg bagpuss!
Stranger: i could
You: i can see it now - "bagpuss stars in dominatrix sluts part deux"
Stranger: im a sub
Stranger: refine the title and you can produce
You: haha do you take it in the ear from kinky *****ls?
Stranger: all day er day
You: would you suck off a killer whale if it offered you free stamps?
Stranger: i only get on my knees to pray but since i would have to stand to do that yeah
You: you'd get free willy
You: i'll get my coat
You: you're a christian?
Stranger: no
You: or muslim?
Stranger: hari krishna
You: ah fair enough
Stranger: exactly
You: that makes you slightly less mental, but a ****witt nonetheless
Stranger: its the better of the eastern cults
Stranger: less sex abuse
Stranger: at least less of the unwanted kind
You: no offence like. would you savage a rabbit in exchange for tickets to the premiere of the next shrek film?
Stranger: its not rape if oyu are willing
You: i wouldn't. i'm not sick in the head like yoyu
You: *you
You: rape doesn't exist
You: only 'surprise sex'
Stranger: true
You: Just ask Titus Bramble
You: Are you Titus Bramble?
You: Or Tesfaye?
Stranger: ill get on that
Stranger: the rabbit
You: do it
Stranger: not tom bramble
Stranger: or titus
Stranger: or whoever
You: which are better - huckleberries or dangleberries?
Stranger: i like the word huckle better so the first option
You: hmm...
Stranger: solid logic
You: they're slightly less sexual though, so i was hoping you'd say dangleberries
You: help me out
You: i'm losing my erection
Stranger: that was my final answer
Stranger: cant go back
You: ps. did I just quote R.E.M?
Stranger: i wouldnt knoe
Stranger: i dont like ****ty music
You: fair enough. enjoy your darren huckerby's
Stranger: unless oyu are a sleep thrapist
Stranger: then maybe you did
You: do you like Norwich City? Holt does
You: do you like WWE?
You: I
You: d
You: o
Stranger: i watched it when it was wwf
Stranger: but never liked it
Stranger: my poor millionaire father only let us have one tv and my brother picked the channels
You: but those ****ing pandas made them change the name. i tell you what, the ****ers deserve extinction just for that. That and the fact they're all impotent from eating too many bananas.
Stranger: damn bananas
You: is your papa a slumdog millionaire!?
You: i know. damn bananas and their phallic connotations
Stranger: im not indian no
You: I know, you're Sri Lankan
You: are you?
Stranger: timal tigers
You: hahahaha
Stranger: tamill
Stranger: idk whatever they are
Stranger: m.i.a videos are very educational
You: I'm Hull City AFC - 'The Tigers'
You: I don't like M.I.A
Stranger: eye of the tiger
You: She's made a living out of Joe Strummer's music, the ****ing stupid, boss-eyed bitch
Stranger: money is money
You: Would you eat camel semen out of a durian fruit if I danced naked around stonehenge, filmed it and showed it to some schoolchildren?
You: I'd pay you as well
Stranger: no
You: Why not biatch
You: ????
You: I demand an answer
Stranger: is there a tv included
You: no, but there's a clock radio if you get on your knees and beg like a blind Indian boy with no eyes
Stranger: i only get on my knees to pray
Stranger: so
Stranger: me so soddy
Stranger: cant
You: Or like a Weegie who's trying to save enough money to shop at Waitrose like his chums from Edinburgh
Stranger: whats waitrose
You: So you don't get on your knees to perform oral sex on goats? What a **** Asian you are
Stranger: do i look welsh
You: you do from where i'm sitting
Stranger: im not
You: you look like rhodri giggs' bumhole
You: Waitrose is a shop in the UK
Stranger: i dont shop in the uk
You: it's where all the upper class people like kerry katona and katie price shop. i'd sling one up katona
Stranger: no clue who they are but i get the point
You: no you don't
Stranger: yeah your right
Stranger: youre
Stranger: yarr
You: I'll give you the point. That is, i'd stab you in the eye with a compass and suck the blood out as if I were a vampire bat
Stranger: yurrr
Stranger: old school compass
You: do you like vampire bats? i don't. shifty looking things. they could be irish for all i know
Stranger: its possible
You: they remind me of heathcliff.
You: i don't like heathcliff. he was a ****
Stranger: dirty ****
You: fictional or not
You: would you rim your father for a million rupees?
You: i would
You: he's well fit
You: Bit old though
Stranger: what can a million ruppees get me
Stranger: toliet paper
You: i prefer them sort of 13-15
You: They're ripe but not overripe
You: and it's fun to peel their skin away
You: it fries well
You: and is nice with plantain chips
You: and salt
You: and a can of barr's irn bru
Stranger: when in doubt revert to cannibalism
You: or dandelion and burdock
You: cannibalism is a cornerstone of british society
Stranger: and inbreeding
You: we decided to take all necessary precautions after seeing 28 days later
You: we need to know how to protect the human race.
You: we decided killing off half of it was the best solution
Stranger: highest rate of dwarfism in the world
You: plus i can **** all the defenseless children i want
You: nom ****ing nom on their prepubescent pussies
Stranger: yeah im not actually typing anything of substance
You: nor am i
Stranger: i know
You: only the truth
You: and some things that come into my head
Stranger: truth is subjective
You: the psychiatrist said it would help. he caused most of my problems you know
Stranger: good touch bad touch
You: i was only 11 and he had no right sticking his willy where he did
Stranger: bad touch...
You: my left ear has never recovered
You: he tried to do a john bonham impression on my eardrum
Stranger: as long as the right ear is good
You: nah, daddy saw to that
Stranger: daddy
You: he went for ginger baker though
Stranger: damn you are a brit
You: of course i am
Stranger: of course
You: tea, buck teeth, colonialism and casual racism
You: all in a days work
Stranger: gettin it in
You: i also know the queen, the cousin ****ing, eire corrupting, nazi bitch
Stranger: wow
Stranger: impressive
You: i'd **** a sponge pudding whilst bush senior came in my hair
You: yum yum
Stranger: whats sponge pudding
You: he's the much fitter of the two
You: it's a british food, like fish and chips, roast beef, apple pie or a little boy's chocolate starfish
Stranger: well this has been intersting im off to take a ****
Stranger: gooday
Your conversational partner has disconnected
