The band that follow England around
The last application (though it's on most these days, of course) I picked up had a note at the bottom saying, "if you haven't heard back within X amount of time, please assume that your application has been unsuccessful" - What?! You rude bastards!
Got home from work today, wife had an old replay of 'Come Dine with me' on, started watching it (I know,I know, sorry) and your ****in' feminists wouldn't have been too happy with one of the contestants who told a frosty faced bitch that the last time he saw a face like hers it was on all fours eating grass!Birds who call each other "dude" is annoying.
Mind you, they always got annoyed when i called them luv, mate or pet. My reply was it was just a term of endearment & i meant nothing by it.
****in' feminists.



Condoms
Energy saving light bulbs. They are ****ing ****. Take ages to get going and even then don't emit any light. I was sat reading the paper on the bog last night I looked like a ****ing jap.


Then we should put your optician in Room 101 if you didn't see a police car on 3 separate occasions.
Deal or No Deal and whoever thought it'd be a good idea to have Noel Edmonds present it. It's just a guessing game, there's no skill to it at all. All the contestants have their expenses paid while they wait for their turn, so it isn't costing them much to be there compared with how much they can win.
When Edmonds goes "Oh you're playing a very, very clever game there. I see what you're trying to do.", what the ****ing hell is he on about? The bloke is just pointing at boxes! Then when a low number comes out they go over and hug some random person who opens the box as if they were responsible for it's contents. What a pile of ****e.
Just deal on the first go, say "I'll have my cheque now please" and leave. It could be £350, but it's £350 more than you started the show with. Or even better, scrap the whole ****ing thing.