”He came walking down the corridor and said: ‘Ah you must be Edward Sheringham’. I told him I was, but I preferred to be called Teddy. He said: ‘OK, welcome to the club, Edward’.” Teddy Sheringham about his first day at Forest and meeting Brian Clough.
My definition of an intellectual is someone who can listen to the William Tell Overture without thinking of the Lone Ranger. Billy Connolly
He dribbles a lot and the opposition don't like it - you can see it all over their faces Ron Atkinson
"I saw the execution of Saddam Hussien on the Internet and it really made me think....Is there nothing I won't masterbate to?" Frankie Boyle
“Working in Poundstretcher for no wages…working in a shop where everything is worth a quid except you." Kevin Bridges
On Rangers going into liquidation: "Scottish football is famously a two horse race and we've now lost a horse. Scottish football has become showjumping." Kevin Bridges
If its not working I will pull you off at half time Alf Ramsey That sounds good we only get oranges at QPR Rodney Marsh
Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman - or a bad woman; it depends on how much happiness you can handle. George Burns
It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth. George Burns
