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Post a lie about the poster above.

Discussion in 'Peterborough' started by DMD, Oct 14, 2014.

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  1. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Obi kindly didn't charge any money when he hired out his 8 men, his 3 shire horses, his crane and his fork lift truck, or for his six hours labour, when he helped get me back on my feet after I foolishly tried to do the splits - what a kind generous person he is, bearing in mind he works during the week as a debt collector for Wonga.
     
    #601
    Wooperts_duck, Nov 29, 2014
  2. Obi Wan

    Obi Wan keeper of the peace
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    Woopert foolishly thinks I 'kindly' helped him out for nowt.

    He hasn't seen my bill yet (including the WONGA interest rates that mean he has to double the amount due for every hour he doesn't pay it).


    Mwwwwhahhahahahaahhhahahaahhahhaaaaaa
     
    #602
    Obi Wan, Nov 29, 2014
  3. Minxy

    Minxy Just Me

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    Obi is kind & generous :D
     
    #603
    Minxy, Nov 30, 2014
  4. Is Vic there?

    Is Vic there? Top Tipster

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    Minxy has had the names of her treasured doggies tattooed on her bosoms :D
     
    #604
    Is Vic there?, Nov 30, 2014
  5. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Vic has got me in big big trouble by persuading me to remove Minxy's bra with my teeth, so he could admire the tattoos of her puppies...........I am currently running down Peterborough High Street, being chased by Mr M...............and struggling to type this message on my mobile, whilst trying to outrun her hubby.........<yikes>
     
    #605
    Wooperts_duck, Nov 30, 2014
  6. Obi Wan

    Obi Wan keeper of the peace
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    Despite bring the schoolboy champion of the '60 yard dash' back in 1935, Woopert realised to his dismay that running through Peterborough High Street with his trousers around his ankles and while trying to text at the same time was not a good idea. He tripped over next to a fruit and veg market stall and landed with his face in some poor old lady's melons. Meanwhile, MR M had caught up with him...
     
    #606
    Obi Wan, Dec 1, 2014
  7. Minxy

    Minxy Just Me

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    Despite seeing his friend Woops in deep trouble ..... Obi decided to film the whole episode & sell it to the highest bidder

    Shame on you Obi :(
     
    #607
    Minxy, Dec 1, 2014
  8. DMD

    DMD Eh?
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    Minxy was the second highest bidder, but did offer other inducements.
     
    #608
    DMD, Dec 1, 2014
  9. Obi Wan

    Obi Wan keeper of the peace
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    That's the last time DMD is ever going to one of those filthy, sleazy, degrading lap dancing clubs!



    After an 12 hour solid shift he only earned £3.27 - and that was from Woopert.
     
    #609
    Obi Wan, Dec 1, 2014
  10. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Typical Obi, keeping £1 for himself when counting the takings - I actually paid DMD £4.27 to keep his undercrackers on.

    Vic paid him a fiver.......
     
    #610
    Wooperts_duck, Dec 1, 2014

  11. Obi Wan

    Obi Wan keeper of the peace
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    Woopert loves supporting charities and helping others in need. He now visits the local sperm bank at least five times every day to make a donation. Wonderful man.
     
    #611
    Obi Wan, Dec 2, 2014
  12. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    obi runs the local sperm bank and secretly switches the desirable donations for his own
     
    #612
    kiwiqpr, Dec 2, 2014
  13. DMD

    DMD Eh?
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    Kiwiqpr visits the local sperm bank at least five times every day to make a withdrawal. Strange man.
     
    #613
    DMD, Dec 2, 2014
  14. Obi Wan

    Obi Wan keeper of the peace
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    DMD is always working at the local sperm bank to give a helping hand.
     
    #614
    Obi Wan, Dec 2, 2014
  15. Deleted 1

    Deleted 1 Well-Known Member
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    Obi got banned from the local sperm bank - they offered him a copy of Penthouse and he asked for a newspaper report of the Newcastle v Man united game from October 1996
     
    #615
    Deleted 1, Dec 2, 2014
  16. Charlie1

    Charlie1 Well-Known Member

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    The local sperm bank have banned Dan Starkey as on his last visit he left a jar of mayonnaise instead of his donation which he mistakenly took home. He has gone right off Hellmans on his cheese sandwich.
     
    #616
    Charlie1, Dec 2, 2014
  17. Obi Wan

    Obi Wan keeper of the peace
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    Charlie was a test tube baby amazingly created by using a jar of mayonnaise.
     
    #617
    Obi Wan, Dec 2, 2014
  18. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Obi used to enjoy watching Come Dancing on TV in the 1960's. Infact, he still wears his Victor Sylvester trousers, as they have plenty of ballroom.
     
    #618
    Wooperts_duck, Dec 2, 2014
  19. Charlie1

    Charlie1 Well-Known Member

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    Woppert once took part in Come Dancing on tv but took the title literally and had to be escorted off the dancefloor as his partner was left embarrassed and a fuming Terry Wogan who sent Woopert his dry cleaning bill.
     
    #619
    Charlie1, Dec 2, 2014
  20. DMD

    DMD Eh?
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    Charlie1's great grandchildren are sick to death of her offering them Werthers Originals every time they drive round to see her.
     
    #620
    DMD, Dec 2, 2014
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