Jokes

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A man runs up the street obviously leeing from someone. He sees and Nun and goes to her. :Please, can i hide under your habit?" She agrees and he ducks under. Two MPs come along and ask if she had seen a man running. She says yes and points 'He went that way". The MPs dash off. The man comes out from under her habit. "Thanks, for that. I don't want to go to Iraq. By the way, you've got an impressive pair of legs." "Yes" says the nun."if you'd looked a little higher you would have seen and impressive pair of balls. I don't want to go to Iraq either".
 
Went to see a mind reader last night.
She said "Think of a card, any card"
"OK"
"Is it the four of clubs?"
"No"
"Ace of diamonds?"
"No"
"What is it then?"
"Birthday"
 
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