I went into the library and asked if they had a book called, "How to spot a lady-boy." He said, "I'm sure we do, it's probably tucked away somewhere." I said, "That's the one."
Blew my chances of getting a job at my local police station, by answering "no comment" to every question at my interview.
During my check up I asked the Doctor, "Do you think I'll live a long and healthy life then?" He replied, "I doubt it. Mercury is in Uranus right now." I said, "I don't go in for any of that astrology nonsense." He replied, "Neither do I, but my thermometer just broke."
Feminists say all men are potential rapists but, surely, by that same logic it would mean all women are potential rape victims. And believe me there"s a lot of dog-ugly women out there I wouldn"t waste my duct tape on.
My mate somehow got a vacuum cleaner hose stuck up his arse. When I phoned the hospital to see how he was doing, they told me he was picking up nicely.
