This is amusing and very well written. Probably the most cynical pisstake I've ever read.
It has nothing to do with the stress ball demo, he is simply using it as a method of deflection.
This is all about appeasing the nuisance that is football's regulators and a persistent MP. These are empty words, they goad those who oppose him.
There has not been any concession given, he's moved the goalposts in full sight and is having another good laugh at everyone.
He's making a cynical play for the moral high ground, don't be foolish and attend these meetings and play his well thought through game.