1st Impressions

DevAdvocate

DevAdvocate

Gigging bassist
Jan 21, 2010
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Up my own arse
Anyone reading GC for the first time might come to these conclusions:

Mindy – Accident prone buffoon
Dev – Angry, hairy high pitched midget
Grove – Unapologetic and as yet undiscovered child molester
Monaco – Dodgy Dave Kingalike with a cuboid head
Gambol – Hideously deformed Lanarkshire ner do well
Jiffy – Severely disabled expatriate sicko
Nev – Morbidly obese Rangers-Loving Ned
Edge – Sexually unfulfilled teen stalker
Duncan – Argumentative SPFL hating yokel
Toby – Pedantic yet volatile dimbulb
Tina – Frustrated Cougar
ST – ****y vegan nationalist
Mick O’Toon – Affable thick blarney peddler
Ponders - Cunning linguist


Apologies to anyone left out and feel free to add your own list but please don't simply choose an individual, do everyone (Fnar fnar).
 
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Mindy – Who?
Dev – Pdo
Grove – Alleged Pdo
Monaco – Property Ty'coon'
Gambol – Funny
Jiffy – Spastic Arab
Duncan – Train Stalker
Toby – Pratt (someone who know's him in real life, genuine description of him to me <laugh> )
Tina – Bitch slapped, bag lady
ST – The real Tina
Mick O’Toon – Lovable Irish Rogue
Ponders - Imposter
CIAran - Bomber / IRA
Aldo - Scottish alcoholic, Catholic hater, wife beater and genuine all round nice guy
 
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Mindy – Not as stupid as he looks
Dev – A cross between Begbie from Trainspotting and Tommy Chong
Grove – Rolf Harris without the personality
Monaco – The unfunniest poster on not606
Gambol – Rapey, ****y, alky
Jiffy – Moved to Muzzieland so he could marry his 14 year old cousin
Nev – Stalker, ****s to tranny porn, probably the most normal person on General Chat
Edge – Nigel Farage-wannabe, pussy-whipped, probably impotent
Duncan – Like all ugly men, had to marry an Asian woman off the internet to avoid a life of crushing loneliness
Toby – Annoying, pretentious, misunderstood
Tina – Aged anywhere between 35 and 126, weighs anywhere between 18 and 34 stone, possibly Nev
ST – A ****ing good ****, hung like a pony, actually unemployed but pretends he's important
Mick O’Toon – Generic Irish bloke
Ciaren - Like Mick O'Toon but likes to pretend he's 'connected' to feel important
Ponders - Doubt there's a bigger prick on not606
Aldo - middle-aged, into military stuff, likes to be left alone. Expect to see him on the news soon in connection with a mass-shooting
 
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Cup Face said:
Mindy – Not as stupid as he looks
Dev – A cross between Begbie from Trainspotting and Tommy Chong
Grove – Rolf Harris without the personality
Monaco – The unfunniest poster on not606
Gambol – Rapey, ****y, alky
Jiffy – Moved to Muzzieland so he could marry his 14 year old cousin
Nev – Stalker, ****s to tranny porn, probably the most normal person on General Chat
Edge – Nigel Farage-wannabe, pussy-whipped, probably impotent
Duncan – Like all ugly men, had to marry an Asian woman off the internet to avoid a life of crushing loneliness
Toby – Annoying, pretentious, misunderstood
Tina – Aged anywhere between 35 and 126, weighs anywhere between 18 and 34 stone, possibly Nev
ST – A ****ing good ****, hung like a pony, actually unemployed but pretends he's important
Mick O’Toon – Generic Irish bloke
Ciaren - Like Mick O'Toon but likes to pretend he's 'connected' to feel important
Ponders - Doubt there's a bigger prick on not606
Aldo - middle-aged, into military stuff, likes to be left alone. Expect to see him on the news soon in connection with a mass-shooting
Click to expand...
I liked them all apart from the lies you told about me and yourself. Or is it you and yourself, I can never remember.
 
Using the "Chewin The Fat" personality rating...

Mindy – ****
Dev – ****
Grove – ****
Monaco – Good guy
Gambol – Good guy
Jiffy – ****
Nev – Good guy
Edge – Good guy
Duncan – ****
Toby – ****
Tina – ****
ST – ****
Mick O’Toon – ****
Ciaren - ****
Ponders - ****
Aldo - Good guy
 
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Dev-Not enough evidence to charge him
Mindy- Republican/unionist and constantly confused.
Barrie- not quite right.
Grove- not anywhere near right
Gas- just wrong
Gambol- he's the last of the famous international playboys.
Simon - not a bad bloke for a Nazi
Kev- misunderstood even by himself
Toby- walking talking tantrum
Tina- spent too many years on the game
Trev - he's two, two and a half of our own
Ciaran - archetypal pikey
Mick O'Toon - sorry but golf doesn't make you any less a pikey
ST- Bent as the back road to Shotts.
Pud - Currently doing 3-5 for downloading child pornography.
Cup face- ST's Hetrosexual alter ego. Still as bent as...blah blah blah.
 
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