Raging Royalists

Shut up you ya treacherous rat.

 

The Jocks get done over by all and sundry and then go running off to the French (and the Pope).

Nowt ever comes of it, though.

 

It is rather embarrassing that the English conquered us

The Vikings ye can understand, but the ****in Nigels...

Safe to say my surname is from Norse ah batter every ****

 

...except by the Romans. Rather ironic is that.

 

Obviously, it has historical inaccuracies but out of all the historical drama series on TV, it's probably the most historically accurate.

The identity of 'Englishness' as an ethnic group didn't develop until the unification of England as a kingdom. Historically speaking, the English were created as an amalgamation of Anglo-Saxons and Danes who lived side-by-side in England. People in Yorkshire and other parts of the Danelaw can claim Danish heritage as much as Anglo-Saxon heritage. The DNA of Anglo-Saxons and Danes was indistinguishable because they all lived on the Jutland Peninsula. After the Angles, Saxons and Jutes left for Britain, the Danes moved into Jutland and assimilated with the remaining Angles, Saxons and Jutes. Most English people have similar DNA to Danes and northern Germans.

 

I want gambol to teach my nieces their history

 

Hoad the bus. We battered Nigel at Banockburn despite their blatant cheating. We then ficked them up all over the north of England and only decided to come home because the acenery was so ****e down there.

 

Jist say Nigel then. Canny go wrang.

 

Gambol likes this a lot.

 

Some wont like this,no siree bob,not one bit.

 

...aye, after they conquered us in the first place.

 

I just love the diea of a 5 year old coming home to her parents and saying "we learned about the Romans today - those tallie ****ers got their ****s kicked right in"

 

Dan didne think that wan through

 

Eh?

The Romans swarmed across Scotland until they reached the Grampians. It was at this point they realised they were going to find nothing but rocks and thistles and turned back.

The damage had been done, though. Scotland was lumbered with its first pizzeria. In Greenock.

 

Jist a temporary blip due to us busy getting pished wea some Norsemen.

 

...and don't forget they learned some Latin too

Gambol the educator

 

Aye course the did. Then stopped aff to build a couple of walls so they widne need to batter us again.

 

The Romans only ever conquered the Britons so we should be taking the piss out of the modern Welsh. Arsed kicked by Romans then after the Romans left, arse kicked by Anglo-Saxons who made them **** themselves and run west.

 

Nor did Gambol - they're 11, 9 and 5