Off Topic The Rep Brothel

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kiwiqpr said:
9 months later!!!
Jack decided to go skiing with his buddy, Bob. So they
loaded up Jack's minivan and headed north..
After driving for a few hours, they got caught in a terrible
blizzard. So they pulled into a nearby Mansion and asked the
attractive lady who answered the door if they could spend
the night. 'I realize it's terrible weather out there and I
have this huge house all to myself, but I'm recently widowed
,' she explained. 'I'm afraid the neighbours will talk if I
let you stay in my house.'
'Don't worry,' Jack said.. 'We'll be happy to sleep in the
shed. And if the weather breaks, we'll be gone at first
light.' The lady agreed, and the two men found their way to
the shed and settled in for the night. Come morning, the
weather had cleared, and they got on their way. They enjoyed
a great weekend of skiing. But about nine months later, Jack
got an unexpected letter from an attorney. It took him a few
minutes to figure it out, but he finally determined that it
was from the attorney of that attractive widow he had met on
the ski weekend...
He dropped in on his friend Bob and asked, "Bob, do you
remember that good-looking widow from the farm we stayed at
on our ski holiday up north about 9 months ago?"
"Yes, I do." Said Bob..
"Did you, er, happen to get up in the middle of the night,
go up to the house and pay her a visit?"
"Well, um, yes!," Bob said, a little embarrassed about being
found out, I have to admit that I did.."
"And did you happen to give her my name instead of telling
her your name?"
Bob's face turned beet red and he said, "Yeah, look, I'm
sorry,buddy.. I'm afraid I did.' 'Why do you ask?"
"She just died and left me everything."


(And you thought the ending would be different, didn't
you?... You know you smiled...now keep that smile for the
rest of the day!)
Click to expand...

.:emoticon-0111-blush.
 
A Scotsman walks into a bank in Glasgow and asks for the loan officer.
He tells the loan officer that he is going to Australia on business
For two weeks and needs to borrow £5,000.
The bank officer tells him that the bank
Will need some form of security for the loan,
So the canny Scots lad hands over the keys
And documents of new Ferrari parked
On the street in front of the bank.
He produces the Log Book and everything checks out.
The loan officer agrees to accept
The car as collateral for the loan.
The bank's Manager and its officers
All enjoy a good laugh at the rough looking Scotsman
For using a £120,000 Ferrari
As collateral against a £5000 loan.
An employee of the bank then
Drives the Ferrari in to the bank's
Underground garage and parks it there.
Two weeks later, the Scotsman returns,
Repays the £5,000 and the interest,
Which comes to £15.41.
The loan officer says,
"Sir, we are very happy to have had your business,
And this transaction has worked out very nicely,
But we are a little puzzled.
While you were away,
We checked you out and found that you are a multi millionaire.
So what puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow "£5,000" ?

The Scotsman replies:

"Where else in Glasgow can I park my car
For two weeks for only £15.41
And expect it to be there when I return'"
 
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