The Horror. Mz Kempton puts ketchup on almost everything, but if you put a bottle ketchup on on the roast dinner table, she'd stab you in the eye with her fork. She's like that.
My stepdad put ketchup on everything, including roast dinners. I wanted to stab him in the eyes every time I saw it.
Maybe they should bring back the lists of people found guilty of motoring offences, weekly reviews of the East Hull Crown Green Bowls league, and proceedings of the last Welton & District WI meeting. Local news wasn't much more fascinating back then, I'm afraid. Truth is, nowt much happens in provincial cities and towns and the local press have to find stories that people will read - and, increasingly, click on. It is articles that generate clicks that allow local papers to fund the remaining important work they do - like reporting on Council initiatives, hailing successful businesses, celebrating people doing good things, etc. The alternative is extinction, which doesn't serve communities particularly well either.
A recent favourite: Daft bint buys a toilet and hand basin set for 250 notes to put in her understairs cupboard expecting the shop she bought it from to plumb it in from scratch for that price. That’s not the deal obvs, so she keeps it in the box for a year and a half before moaning to Hull Life. They contact the shop in a state of vicarious righteous indignation and receive the not unreasonable reply of ‘we were unaware that she couldn’t get it fitted however if she returns it boxed, we’ll refund her money. Still got the miserable photo, the life’s not fair bleating and the criticism of the shop however even though there was no one to blame other than herself.
Iv'e not read 'The Fail' for a few years, this sounds like it's turned into The Sunday Sport. I might have to start getting it.
Hull Live today - 11 of the best Hull put downs Worrawally Mardy Wezzie Nebby Snickersneeze Twerp Mingin Bray ya Shut ya cake ole Knucklehead Twazzock A new low?
What about - puff - queer **** (also soft ****, daft ****, silly ****, tight* ****(*not a compliment)) -get to **** -daft lad, daft lass
Wazark or Wazzock - not sure on sp. - used quite a lot as a kid Buggerlugs (could be affectionate though) Flamer