Troll a Stranger

[Kim Jong Il]

I'm showing people EDGE's 'cocktopus' gif at the moment.

octopus you say?

http://www.octopusgirl.com/

 

[Kim Jong Il]

[NSFW]

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[/NSFW]

 

[jenthesaint1990]

come up here and you can watch while i prove it, might even let you join in if you are not a complete munter.

best offer i've had all week

 

[RAVENBLACK]

Can't be bothered tolling through all the posts but who is the good looking blonde?.

 

[East Acton Ranger]

Decided I would give it a try after reading your efforts

I let him dictate the conversation and waited to see where it ended up


.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You: hi

Stranger: M 23

You: f 19

Stranger: from?

You: london uk

Stranger: k

You: you

Stranger: PAK

Stranger: chose a role for me that you want to play over here

Stranger: nice Boy, Lover boy,Sex Demon

You: sex demon

Stranger: k

Stranger: well tell me about your body assets

You: 34 DD natural, curvey and brunette

Stranger: waoooooo

Stranger: its sexy

You: you virgin?

Stranger: yea

You: me too hehe

Stranger: i really wana play wid these tits

You: go on then.

Stranger: well how can you be still a virgin after possessing these beautiful delicious assets

You: you want a tit job?

Stranger: yea

Stranger: i will love to have one

You: get your cock out

Stranger: hmm wait

You: whats the matter

Stranger: yea its out

Stranger: i waz opening my zip

You: how big is it

Stranger: 7 and half inches

You: wow!

Stranger: and 2 inches thick

You: wow that would rip open my tight pussy

Stranger: yea off course

Stranger: it will love to do so

You: wanna suck my clit

Stranger: if you want it to be done

Stranger: then k

You: nice

You: when i said i was a virgin, i meant i hadn't had virgina intercouce

Stranger: k

Stranger: so wot do u have before?

You: i do blow jobs and tit jobs

Stranger: well baby i will love to tear apart your pussy with my rod

You: you wanna be my first then

Stranger: i am all yours

You: what do you wanna do to me

Stranger: i wana make love to you like a demon and with most sensual way eat you up and then make love to every part of your body

You: ohhhh thats sounds good

Stranger: i dnt want a continuous and lasting relationship if you dnt have any problems or limitations

Stranger: love you baby

You: yeah thats good. you're a bit far away anyway

Stranger: *i want a continuous and lasting relationship

You: oh sorry. thats still cool tho

You: i'll have to see how good you are in bed first

Stranger: i will not disappoint you baby

You: what was you're name? i like sreaming the names of people during sex

Stranger: i can **** you all the day and nite

Stranger: Rashid

You: OHHH RASHID TAKE ME NOW

Stranger: come to my arms my love

Stranger: hug me tighter and tighter

Stranger: i wana get in to your soul

You: give it to me now

You: get you 'rod' and put it in me

Stranger: baby wot style you like

Stranger: you wana come over me or do it in mishinory or doggie style

You: i wanna ride your cock off

Stranger: ohk bbaby come and take

Stranger: it

Stranger: its yours

You: arghhhhh

Stranger: only yours

You: it's so tight

Stranger: aaaaaaaaah yea baby

Stranger: slowly take it all

Stranger: its so tight honey

You: so good but it hurts *ARGHHHHH

Stranger: relax baby its tip is bit in

Stranger: take it slowly

Stranger: Yeaaaaa

You: you broke my hyman

Stranger: aah

Stranger: its going in a bit now

Stranger: it feels so warm

Stranger: and fresh inside your pussy

Stranger: aaaaaaaaaaaaahhh

You: *are you masterbating*

Stranger: yea

Stranger: but i m feeling your warmth

Stranger: jst bend a little give me your tits

You: suck them

Stranger: mmmmmmmmuuunaaaah

Stranger: yeaaa

Stranger: muunah

Stranger: mmmmunnnnnha

Stranger: mmmmmmmuuuuuuunaaaaaaaah

Stranger: yea baby

You: give it to me rashid

Stranger: do it faster

Stranger: yea

You: arghh arghh arghh

Stranger: its all in now thirsting in and out of your pussy ma loove

Stranger: mmmmmmmmmuuuuuuuuunaaaaaaaah

Stranger: aaaaaaaah

Stranger: aaaaaaaaah

Stranger: aaaaaah

Stranger: give me your lips baby

You: i wanna do anal

Stranger: do it faster babay

Stranger: yea bend or you wana ride as well

You: give it to me rashid

Stranger: take it baby

Stranger: its now pointing at your ass

Stranger: ride it my love

You: sorry i got to fart now

Stranger: its ohk baby

Stranger: love you

Stranger: muuuuunnnnnah

You: so i need the toilet. can i suck you on the bog?

Stranger: yea

Stranger: hney sure

You: *sits on toilet

Stranger: k

You: you want me to sick your balls

Stranger: yea sure

You: there small aren't they?

Stranger: no baby they are hanging like little squash balls

You: more like pea balls

You: *diarrhea's

You: arghh thats better

Stranger: yeaa

Stranger: its a heavenly feeling

Stranger: take it honey

You: you wanna eat my **** like in 2 girls 1 cup

Stranger: no baby

You: probably just as well as i got hiv

You: sorry i fogot to tell you :s

Stranger: ohk honey lets die young and handsome

Stranger: and together

You: what do you wanna do next

Stranger: i wnna make you mine forever

You: how you gunna do that

Stranger: lets get married

Stranger: Muuuuuunnnnnahhhhh

You: whoa woah woah!

You: thats not a good idea

You: i need to know your interest before

Stranger: why ?

Stranger: wots the good idea then

Stranger: well tell me how i am in bed

You: it was a dissapointment if im honest

You: but theres room for improvement

Stranger: Really

Stranger: well it was my first time

Stranger: you will teach me well i guess

You: a lot to be precise

You: what are your other interests

Stranger: well reading i am doing a job so i research a bit on the issues which are related to my job

Stranger: and my feavorite sport is cricket i drink occasionally

You: whats cricket?

Stranger: and hang out with friends a lot whenever i have a chance

Stranger: you are from uk?

Stranger: rite

You: yes

You: you from pakistan

Stranger: do you now kevin petersen

Stranger: yea i am from pakistan

Stranger: stuart broad

You: not sure

Stranger: england recently had a great victory over india just a few months back

Stranger: and are no 1 team

You: i heard about pakistan cricket. they were a bunch of cheaters or something

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Can't believe it lasted 20 minutes.
The cricket scandal must have hit a raw nerve

 

[Chancer]

think i've just pissed maself now

 

[jenthesaint1990]

Can't believe it lasted 20 minutes.
The cricket scandal must have hit a raw nerve

 

[Null]

Decided I would give it a try after reading your efforts

I let him dictate the conversation and waited to see where it ended up


.


Can't believe it lasted 20 minutes.
The cricket scandal must have hit a raw nerve

You should have finished with, "guess what...I'm a man"

 

[East Acton Ranger]

I was going to but he must have got offended by the cricket thing

 

[Erik]

You: Yo
Stranger: hi asl
You: 19. F UK
Stranger: ok
You: U
Stranger: im 22 m turkey
You: ???
You: Oh cool
You: I've been to turkey
Stranger: really
You: yeah nice place
Stranger: in which place beach ?
Stranger: bodrum ?
You: fethiye
Stranger: i live in bodrum
You: all i know about bodrum is the airport lol
Stranger:
Stranger: u must have turkish byfrnd ?
You: It's a beautiful country, but the woman are hideous pikeys and the men are all sleazy and look like saddam Hussein
You: no offence
Stranger:
Stranger: really
Stranger: no summer love ?
You: not for me, i'm married to a black man who's got a history of violent assault
Stranger: really
You: yeah
Stranger: re u married
You: yeah, to a golli
Stranger: where is he from
You: ghana
You: he eats my menstrual discharge
You: would you like to eat my period blood?
Stranger: noooo
You: suck my rancid tampons?
Stranger: i want to suck ur aqsshole
Stranger: u cheat ur husband ?
You: tough, u either suck my bloody pussy like the vampire you are or sod off
You: no i won't cheat on him, he's the best way of disposing of used sanitary towels
Stranger: do with me
You: only if we can steal a small child and cook it in a microwave with some parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme
Stranger: what kind of pyscho u re ?
You: a ***** one
Stranger: **** u
You: no, **** the children
You: KILL THE CHILDREN
Stranger: re u child ?
You: no
You: i'm 19
Stranger: so **** u
Stranger: **** ur all hole
You: **** you filthy ****pig

Your conversational partner has disconnected

Hmm.

 

[SaintsForTheWin]

Decided I would give it a try after reading your efforts

I let him dictate the conversation and waited to see where it ended up


.


Can't believe it lasted 20 minutes.
The cricket scandal must have hit a raw nerve

Hmm.

I couldn't stop laughing

 

[Ba's Strawberry Syrup]

Shortest one ever.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey
You: hey asl
Stranger: 23 f india
Stranger: u?
You: 67 M azerbijan
Stranger: ok
You: can i suck your rancid poo?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

 

[Erik]

You: Yo
Stranger: yo?
You: Indeed. I'm up and down like one
You: I test trampolines for a living
Stranger: nice job
You: I also abuse small children in my spare time. There's a wee lassie next door who needs a good rodgering

Your conversational partner has disconnected

Latest effort

 

[Sam Axe]

Shortest one ever.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey
You: hey asl
Stranger: 23 f india
Stranger: u?
You: 67 M azerbijan
Stranger: ok
You: can i suck your rancid poo?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

 

[Peter the spastic paedo]

Hmm.

You're ****ing insane erik

 

[Erik]

You're ****ing insane erik

Why!? Just a normal conversation for me

 

[SaintsForTheWin]

Why!? Just a normal conversation for me

You have no limits.

 

[Erik]

You have no limits.

No, no, no, no, no, no.... there's no limit...

 

[Ba's Strawberry Syrup]

Stranger: hi asl?
You: 14/f/ny
You: u?
Stranger: 15 m cali
Stranger: wanna sext?
You: yeah is that like just talkin sexy?
Stranger: yeah talking dirty
Stranger: like what you would want to do to someone if we're sexually attracted to each other lol
You: are u doin anything naughty now?
Stranger: nope, help me get turned on please and I'll do the same for you
You: mmm ok
You: i'm just horny a lil at the minute
You: rubbing outside my panties
Stranger: Ooh
Stranger: I'm gettin' harder
Stranger: tell me more
You: do u like youung girls like me?
You: im getting wetter
Stranger: a year younger yeah
You: u have a gf?
Stranger: I like that, and nah, just got out of a relationship
You: oh sorry did u doin anything naughty?
You: i gave my last bf a bj
Stranger: yeah, we ****ed every now and then
You: oh im a virgin
Stranger: oooh
You: wud u **** me?
You: u wud have to be gentle
Stranger: if I saw a pic
You: i only ever rub it hurts a lil when i put a finger in wud u be gentle?
Stranger: nope, I can't say I will be gentle.
Stranger: for girls who are virgins, it's gonna hurt the first time
Stranger: hurt and pleasurable
You: oh u like it rough
You: u like anything kinky wat wud u do to me?
Stranger: well, I mean, if you're a virgin, it's gonna hurt no matter what.
You: wat about kinky stuff though?
Stranger: Idk lol, I never did any kinky stuff with myy last gf.
You: r u big and hard yet?
You: i'd like 2 see it and touch it
Stranger: yup, I'd like to see your body too
Stranger: your pussy and tits
You: how big r u ?
Stranger: 7 inch
You: wow :0 wud u get it all inside me?
Stranger: Idk, most likely
You: i'd like that
You: where wud u cum?
Stranger: how big are your titties?
You: only lil just a B
Stranger: it's okay
You: wud u cum on them?
Stranger: yup and your face
You: oh yeah i like the taste
You: do you like piss? sowi if its a silly question
Stranger: no lol
You: oh it dont matter just someone told me something
You: how can i make you hard?
Stranger: tell me how you'd suck me
Stranger: oh wait, do you mean right now or in general?
Stranger: lol
You: now
Stranger: explain to me in full detail how you would suck/**** me
You: This is the FBI cyber marine division and you have been talking to our decoy long enough for us to decode your IP address and triangulate your general position. You are under suspicion of soliciting a minor for sex and local units will be dispatched shortly.
Stranger: **** sorry officer please don't

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

had this kid going for ages.

 

[Erik]