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tony fernandes

Discussion in 'Queens Park Rangers' started by qprted, Oct 31, 2016.

  1. qprted

    qprted Poet Laureate

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    yes yes im a knob jockey
    thats the best thing about poetry
    theres always something for me to see
    no matter how i try not to , ill always make a rhyme
    but for us rangers we are running out of time
    only olly can stoke the fire
    we need players with desire
    that brentford game was dire
    other than that im off to bed
    or down the pub instead
     
    #21
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  2. Wherever

    Wherever Well-Known Member

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    Eh ted lucky, sucky, ducky and ****y all rime with knob jocky
     
    #22
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  3. qprted

    qprted Poet Laureate

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    ON A SERIOUS NOTE GUYS WHAT IS A KNOB JOCKEY IS IT GAY
     
    #23
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  4. Windom Earle

    Windom Earle Well-Known Member

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    That's right mushroom
    It's a slang saying for primarily a male who with legs akimbo has anal sex with another male
    It isn't however confined to being used with a male I have heard it used when describing a woman
    There is a third option as well and as with the other two it involves penetration to be deemed correct
    The third option is different as it can be done solo using any knob say off a Welsh dresser ... Not to be confused with an Irish cross dresser

    As you have proclaimed to one but are married and also have designs on female members of this board I assume you maybe a fourth generation ... Which I know little about

    If you haven't tried a stage three then with your age I would suggest small cast iron knobs before advancing to the post at the foot of the stairs
     
    #24
  5. KPDHoopster

    KPDHoopster Well-Known Member

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    Wish there was a button, for "like and couldn't stop laughing" !!!
     
    #25
  6. Turkish" Premier" Hoops

    Turkish" Premier" Hoops Well-Known Member

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    There's a film in here somewhere, ( mentally ) ill Teds excellent adventure,all about a lunatic poet who goes back in time in a old phone box to bring back characters from the past to illuminate the future of the young.
    Thinking Keanu Reeves for the role of Ted, but due to our low budget and unable to afford A listers anymore having been stung on our last few "Big Name Signings " I think our limit will be Vic Reeves to play Ted with possibly the last surviving member of the Black and White Minstrals to play JFH.
    I Have an old 8mm cine camera I can loan out all we need now is a script a few random R'sssss fans to dress up as the other characters,Holloway,Neil etc and with a budget of £4-67p we should be able to produce an epic along the lines of " Back to the Future " or to give it it's working title " The Four Year Plan "
    If anybody can recommend a director and a producer as well as a transgender lesbian gay straight person to play Mentally ill Teds love interest we are quids in, Any volunteers?
     
    #26
  7. KPDHoopster

    KPDHoopster Well-Known Member

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    I've got a pet parrot. that could play Holloway. Although thinking about it, my parrot can enunciate coherent words - so probably not a good fit !!
     
    #27
  8. Steelmonkey

    Steelmonkey Well-Known Member

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    Think Swords may be available........<laugh><laugh><laugh>
     
    #28
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  9. Sooperhoop

    Sooperhoop Well-Known Member

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    We could do a 'Wallace & Gromit' type film using plasticine or play-doh. There's a ready-made character for JFH, just use Tony Hart's 'Morph'...
     
    #29
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  10. qprted

    qprted Poet Laureate

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    COMEDY GOLD GENTS THATS CHEERED ME UP A LITTLE BUT WHERE AND HOW DO I END UP WITH QPRBETH
    I KNOW SHE HAS A PARTNER BUT MY BEAUTIFULL MRS, BRIAN WANT TO THROW ME OUT SHE SAYS MY PENUS IS LIKE A BUTTON MUSHROOM
    SO IS THERE ANYHOPE AT ALL FOR ME
    HOW COME I ALWAYS END UP COMMING LAST OR LOSING,COULD BRIAN NOT MARRY BETHS HUSPAND AND I END UP WITH QPRBETH
     
    #30
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  11. ELLERS

    ELLERS Well-Known Member

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    Ted I think you should stop mentioning posters names in your (whatever they are) poems. It getting personal. To be fair I don't mind your drivel as I don't really bother reading it however last week you said this about me.

    Now your keep going on about Beth and her husband. It's becoming a bit weird and personal. Stick to your football nonesense. :emoticon-0148-yes:
     
    #31
  12. qprted

    qprted Poet Laureate

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    FANTASTIC PIECE OF ADVICE ELLERS BUT ARE WE ALL KNOB JOCKEYS
    OR JUST PLAIN BEER DRINKING COCKNEYS
    ELLERS ID FOLLOW YOU TO THE END OF THE EARTH
    BUT HOW THE XXXX DO I GET RID OF THE DUTCHMAN AND UNEARTH
    MY BEAUTIFULL OLLYKINS I ,LOVE HIM HES MY MAN
    ILL HAVE TO DO THE BEST I CAN
    I JUST CANT COPE
    IM BENDING OVER TO PICK UP THE SOAP
     
    #32
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  13. Windom Earle

    Windom Earle Well-Known Member

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    Ted

    Replace your underwear with a bio degradable mesh and you could have your own cottage industry
    Be sure to sprinkle in a few broken egg shells one a week

    Once things get ripe offer your crotch a few flesh eating insects you will head to the golden light knowing you were at least organic
     
    #33
  14. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    you should see him on the barnsley forum
     
    #34
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  15. ELLERS

    ELLERS Well-Known Member

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    You have taken over the Barnsley board. :emoticon-0148-yes:
     
    #35
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  16. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    and utrs
    and wherever
    and aussie

    its where we go to relax and have fun
     
    #36
  17. YappyR

    YappyR Well-Known Member

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    Ted, how do you type without your hands mate, you might want somebody to give you a nice shave


    maxresdefault.jpg
     
    #37
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  18. qprted

    qprted Poet Laureate

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    oh dear im trying to put a brave face on it but im starting to hate the jimmy floyde operation
    the only thing i can see is relegation
     
    #38
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  19. ELLERS

    ELLERS Well-Known Member

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    Agree Ted
     
    #39
  20. qprted

    qprted Poet Laureate

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    THANK GOD THE IMBICILE HAS GONE,TIME TO BANG YOUR DRUM
    NOW BIG SAM HAS GOT ANGRY HE HAS COME
    NO MORE
    A BORE DRAW
    NOW WE CRUSH ALL OPPOSITION
    AND SOON WE WILL BE IN A PLAY OFF POSITION
    BUT JIMMY SHOULD HAVE BEEN SACKED AFTER THE TOON
    NOW THE THE FANS WOULD HAVE BEEN SINGING A DIFFERANT TUNE
    BUT WE WILL BE CELEBRATING SOON
    ME AND ELLERS WILL BE OVER THE MOON
    NOW ITS TIME FOR US TO COME OUT OF OUR COCOON
     
    #40
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