Stay strong for those lads mate. It’s going to be tough for you personally for good while, but slowly the pain will start to ease and there will come a time when you will be able to rebuild. You have your health and my advise would be to hit the gym harder to burn off your anger and not hit the bottle to numb the pain. Believe me it doesn’t work.
Drink is the biggest hypocrite there is ...
... a depressant that makes you happy while it's in your hand.