Off Topic The offical: Jokes THREAD
- Thread starter Garlic Klopp
- Start date
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TRAIN TICKET
Three women and three men are travelling by train to the football game..
At the station, the three men each buy a ticket and watchas the three women buy just one ticket.
'How are the three of you going to travel on only one
ticket?' asks one of the men.
'Watch and learn,' answers one of the women.
They all board the train. The three men taketheir
respective seats
but all three women cram into a toilet
together and close the door.
Shortly after the train has departed, the
conductor comes around collecting tickets. He knocks on the
toilet door and says, 'Ticket, please.'
The door opens just a crack, and a single arm emerges with
a ticket in hand.
The conductor takes it and moves on.
The men see this happen and agree it was quite a clever
idea so after the game, they decide to do the same
thing on the return trip and save some money.
When they get to the station they buy a single ticket for
the return trip but see, to their astonishment, that the
three women don't buy any ticket at all!!
'How are you going to travel without a ticket?' asks one
perplexed man.
'Watch and learn,' answer the women.
When they board the train, the three men
cram themselves into a toilet, and the three women cram into
a toilet just down the way.
Shortly after the train is on its way, one
of the womenleaves her toilet and walks over to the
toilet in whichthe men are hiding. She knocks on their door
and says,'Ticket please.'
I'm still trying to figure out why men think they are smarter than women.
Three women and three men are travelling by train to the football game..
At the station, the three men each buy a ticket and watchas the three women buy just one ticket.
'How are the three of you going to travel on only one
ticket?' asks one of the men.
'Watch and learn,' answers one of the women.
They all board the train. The three men taketheir
respective seats
but all three women cram into a toilet
together and close the door.
Shortly after the train has departed, the
conductor comes around collecting tickets. He knocks on the
toilet door and says, 'Ticket, please.'
The door opens just a crack, and a single arm emerges with
a ticket in hand.
The conductor takes it and moves on.
The men see this happen and agree it was quite a clever
idea so after the game, they decide to do the same
thing on the return trip and save some money.
When they get to the station they buy a single ticket for
the return trip but see, to their astonishment, that the
three women don't buy any ticket at all!!
'How are you going to travel without a ticket?' asks one
perplexed man.
'Watch and learn,' answer the women.
When they board the train, the three men
cram themselves into a toilet, and the three women cram into
a toilet just down the way.
Shortly after the train is on its way, one
of the womenleaves her toilet and walks over to the
toilet in whichthe men are hiding. She knocks on their door
and says,'Ticket please.'
I'm still trying to figure out why men think they are smarter than women.
ADVICE NEEDED
I am thinking of giving my wife roses for valentines but the internet is coming up with conflicting advice, it is a minefield of etiquette and superstition.
Should I give her 6, 12 or just give her the whole tin?
I am thinking of giving my wife roses for valentines but the internet is coming up with conflicting advice, it is a minefield of etiquette and superstition.
Should I give her 6, 12 or just give her the whole tin?
Jack, a handsome man, walked into a sports bar around 9:58 pm. He sat down next to this blonde at the bar and stared up at the TV as the 10:00 news came on. The news crew was covering a story of a man on a ledge of a large building preparing to jump.
The blonde looked at Jack and said, "Do you think he'll jump?"
Jack says, "You know what, I bet he will." The blonde replied, "Well, I bet he won't." Jack placed £30 on the bar and said, "You're on!"
Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy did a swan dive off of the building, falling to his death. The blonde was very upset and handed her £30 to Jack, saying, "Fair's fair... Here's your money."
Jack replied, "I can't take your money, I saw this earlier on the 6 o'clock news and knew he would jump."
The blonde replies, "I did too; but I didn't think he'd do it again."
Jack took the money
The blonde looked at Jack and said, "Do you think he'll jump?"
Jack says, "You know what, I bet he will." The blonde replied, "Well, I bet he won't." Jack placed £30 on the bar and said, "You're on!"
Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy did a swan dive off of the building, falling to his death. The blonde was very upset and handed her £30 to Jack, saying, "Fair's fair... Here's your money."
Jack replied, "I can't take your money, I saw this earlier on the 6 o'clock news and knew he would jump."
The blonde replies, "I did too; but I didn't think he'd do it again."
Jack took the money
