Ot- Phoenix nights quotes

[Marshyx]

whats you favorite one?

mine is...

'Pyscic? whats the bloody hells a pyscic'

 

[Steven Toast]

"Jesus loves you Brian"
"He's got a funny way of showing it."

Or

"Hide it? It's a ten foot cock and balls man!"
"We could disguise it?"
"Yeah, alright then, we'll pop hat on it and say it's you."

 

[Chazz Rheinhold]

covered in piss

 

[Quill]

[video=youtube;YRUX9Ouqfss]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YRUX9Ouqfss[/video]

 

[DMD]

I want to moonwalk son, but life's a ****house!

 

[Quill]

Get back you bastards, I'll break your legs.

 

[Spook]

"Like I say, she has got a cock, so, you have been warned."

 

[Marshyx]

remember, fun is the key but keep seated at all times or you may die... shabba

 

[Quill]

Paddy: Prostitutes are rough in Amsterdam. First one I went with, made me wash me old man in t'sink.
Max: You took your dad?

 

[Quill]

It's a family fun day man, there's kiddies running around. They can't go jumping up and down on a love length.

 

[Quill]

My personal fave...

"I don't know whether you've noticed but I'm disabled."

 

[Quill]

Paddy: What on earth is that?

Max: That my friend, is a German Broomhandle Mauser.

Paddy: I'm not using that...

Max: Why, what's wrong with it?

Paddy: It's an antique that's what it is.

Max: Hey. It's not an antique. There's nothing wrong with that. It was my granddad's. He shot a German with this.

Paddy: Was that in the Second World War?

Max: No, it were in Benidorme. He had a row over a sun lounger.

 

[originallambrettaman]

"You are the wind beneath my wheels"

 

[Charlie1]

"Garlic bread, It's the future, I've tasted it".

 

[Quill]

Jerry: What's the matter with me? I'll tell you what's the matter with me. Me first week as licensee, I'm stood here looking like a gay Satan cos somebody sold all me clothes on t'jumble. I've been rolled round t'car park all day dressed as a hernia and I've got 12 people in casualty with rubber burns.


Brian: Rubber Burns? Weren't he a Scottish poet?

 

[Quill]

It just came to me in a dream, like St. Paul on the road to Domestos.

 

[originallambrettaman]

"They haven't been this excited since they gave out the address of that ****phile"

 

[Spook]

"Is it me, or do all pensioners stink of piss?"

.

 

[FLG]

Paddy: Prostitutes are rough in Amsterdam. First one I went with, made me wash me old man in t'sink.
Max: You took your dad?

A bit further in that scene a bunch of dwarf Bolton fans get out of a mini-bus and start walking towards the club.

Paddy : I hate matchdays.
Max : How far away are THEY?

 

[Polly13]

Two stand out for me:

"Get 'im in The Pennine Suite", and "I'm getting a word... and that word is...nonce..."