brisbane-lion
Well-Known Member
Can you imagine any girl of any worth being seen with the turkey on the right dressed like that? I thought his plastic boots were bad enough, but this...............
Jokes
- Thread starter ellandback
- Start date
-
Please bear with us on the new site integration and fixing any known bugs over the coming days. If you can not log in please try resetting your password and check your spam box. If you have tried these steps and are still struggling email [email protected] with your username/registered email address
-
You must log in or register to see images
Always wondered who these people were who stood round a fcuk big hole with their hands in pockets thanks for the education
“Swearing at Work."
Dear Employee:
It has been brought to management's attention that you have been using foul language during the course of normal conversation with your colleagues.
Due to complaints received from some employees who may be easily offended, this type of language will no longer be tolerated.
We do, however, realise the critical importance of being able to accurately express your feelings when communicating with colleagues.
Therefore, a list of 12 new and innovative, "TRY SAYING" phrases that have been provided, so that proper exchange of ideas and information can continue in an effective manner.
1.
Try Saying:
I think you could do with more training
Instead Of:
You don't have a f*cking clue, do you?
2.
Try Saying:
She's an aggressive go-getter.
Instead Of:
She's a f*cking power-crazy bitch
3.
Try Saying:
Perhaps I can work late
Instead Of:
And when the f*ck do you expect me to do this?
4.
Try Saying:
I'm certain that isn't feasible
Instead Of:
F*ck off arse-wipe
5.
Try Saying:
Really?
Instead Of:
Well f*ck me backwards with a barge pole
6.
Try Saying:
Perhaps you should check with...
Instead Of:
Try telling someone who gives a ****.
7.
Try Saying:
I wasn't involved in the project.
Instead Of:
Not my f*cking problem, mate.
8.
Try Saying:
That's interesting.
Instead Of:
What the f*ck?
9.
Try Saying:
I'm not sure this can be implemented within the given timescale.
Instead Of:
No f*cking chance mate.
10.
Try Saying:
It will be tight, but I'll try to schedule it in
Instead Of:
Why the f*ck didn't you tell me that yesterday?
11.
Try Saying:
He's not familiar with the issues
Instead Of:
He's got his head up his f*cking arse.
12.
Try Saying:
Excuse me?
Instead Of:
Oi, ****face.
Dear Employee:
It has been brought to management's attention that you have been using foul language during the course of normal conversation with your colleagues.
Due to complaints received from some employees who may be easily offended, this type of language will no longer be tolerated.
We do, however, realise the critical importance of being able to accurately express your feelings when communicating with colleagues.
Therefore, a list of 12 new and innovative, "TRY SAYING" phrases that have been provided, so that proper exchange of ideas and information can continue in an effective manner.
1.
Try Saying:
I think you could do with more training
Instead Of:
You don't have a f*cking clue, do you?
2.
Try Saying:
She's an aggressive go-getter.
Instead Of:
She's a f*cking power-crazy bitch
3.
Try Saying:
Perhaps I can work late
Instead Of:
And when the f*ck do you expect me to do this?
4.
Try Saying:
I'm certain that isn't feasible
Instead Of:
F*ck off arse-wipe
5.
Try Saying:
Really?
Instead Of:
Well f*ck me backwards with a barge pole
6.
Try Saying:
Perhaps you should check with...
Instead Of:
Try telling someone who gives a ****.
7.
Try Saying:
I wasn't involved in the project.
Instead Of:
Not my f*cking problem, mate.
8.
Try Saying:
That's interesting.
Instead Of:
What the f*ck?
9.
Try Saying:
I'm not sure this can be implemented within the given timescale.
Instead Of:
No f*cking chance mate.
10.
Try Saying:
It will be tight, but I'll try to schedule it in
Instead Of:
Why the f*ck didn't you tell me that yesterday?
11.
Try Saying:
He's not familiar with the issues
Instead Of:
He's got his head up his f*cking arse.
12.
Try Saying:
Excuse me?
Instead Of:
Oi, ****face.
Dear Mr Wetherspoon, aka Worsel Scumage.
I'm sorry to hear about your beerless struggles.
Maybe you should embark on a journey to the f*cking toilets in one of your establishments to pass the time??? The whole ****show might be sorted by the time you get back..
Last time I made the perilous journey to the bathroom I climbed so many levels I was given Oxygen by the 'Sherpa at the Stairs staging post' half way up and left Earths atmosphere rounding the final bend. Everyone had aged about 20 years when I returned, I had grandchildren... but I hadn't aged a day!
I'm sorry to hear about your beerless struggles.
Maybe you should embark on a journey to the f*cking toilets in one of your establishments to pass the time??? The whole ****show might be sorted by the time you get back..
Last time I made the perilous journey to the bathroom I climbed so many levels I was given Oxygen by the 'Sherpa at the Stairs staging post' half way up and left Earths atmosphere rounding the final bend. Everyone had aged about 20 years when I returned, I had grandchildren... but I hadn't aged a day!
You must log in or register to see images
Last edited:
There is of course two very simple words which will suffice namely
Fcuk off
You must log in or register to see images
brisbane-lion
Well-Known Member
Could you imagine these people ever taking a bath? They always seem to be rugged up to the eyeballs and never properly dressed. Hard to take them seriously, though one must, I suppose.
You must log in or register to see images
You must log in or register to see images
You must log in or register to see images