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Jokes
- Thread starter ellandback
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And Germany is mobilising
Things don’t change
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brisbane-lion
Well-Known Member
The word 'tsunami' is not in my phone's predictive text dictionary.
So if you ever get a text from me saying, "Trumang!!!" get the F**K off the beach.
So if you ever get a text from me saying, "Trumang!!!" get the F**K off the beach.
I went to the chemist today and said, "I've got a really bad headache. Can you make me something up?"
He said, "Frank Sinatra was in here earlier."
He said, "Frank Sinatra was in here earlier."
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'Don't do this to me Nan, I've told Meghan that we're inheriting Windsor Castle. Don't make me tell her it's not happening...'
Oh and Harry, tell that American bitch, **** Hall isn't a big house in the countryside.
NEWLY MARRIED RICH BUY A MANSION HOUSE IN lIVERPOOL DUE TO THE LOW CRIME RATE
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Many years ago during my married days, I accidentally overturned my golf cart.
Elizabeth, a very attractive and keen golfer, who lived in a villa on the golf course, heard the noise and called out: "Are you okay? What's your name?"
"It's John, and I'm okay, thanks," I replied as I pulled myself out of the twisted cart.
"John," she said, (firm loose breasts undulating beneath her white silky robe) "forget your troubles. Come to my villa, rest a while and I'll help you get the cart up later."
"That's mighty nice of you," I answered, "but I don't think my wife would like it."
"Oh, come on now," Elizabeth insisted.
She was so very pretty, very very sexy and very persuasive ... I was weak. "Well okay," I finally agreed but thought to myself, "my wife won't like it."
After a couple of restorative Scotch and waters, I thanked Elizabeth. "I feel a lot better now, but I know my wife is going to be really upset. So I'd best go now."
"Don't be silly!" Elizabeth said with a smile, letting her robe fall open slightly. "She won't know anything. By the way, where is she?"
"Still under the cart, I guess."
Elizabeth, a very attractive and keen golfer, who lived in a villa on the golf course, heard the noise and called out: "Are you okay? What's your name?"
"It's John, and I'm okay, thanks," I replied as I pulled myself out of the twisted cart.
"John," she said, (firm loose breasts undulating beneath her white silky robe) "forget your troubles. Come to my villa, rest a while and I'll help you get the cart up later."
"That's mighty nice of you," I answered, "but I don't think my wife would like it."
"Oh, come on now," Elizabeth insisted.
She was so very pretty, very very sexy and very persuasive ... I was weak. "Well okay," I finally agreed but thought to myself, "my wife won't like it."
After a couple of restorative Scotch and waters, I thanked Elizabeth. "I feel a lot better now, but I know my wife is going to be really upset. So I'd best go now."
"Don't be silly!" Elizabeth said with a smile, letting her robe fall open slightly. "She won't know anything. By the way, where is she?"
"Still under the cart, I guess."
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