Question....why are there no Jewish Morris dancers? Answer ...you have to be a complete prick to be one!
A tiger decides to go on a vegan diet. Now he eats three vegans a day and says he's never felt better.
I had an E-mail from a bored housewife who said that she was lonely with nothing to do and could I help. I did, sent her a load of ironing. Hope that cheers her up.