Off Topic Jokes thread

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  • A bloke goes in to work and finds his colleague sitting at his desk, chuckling and shaking his head.
  • On asking, "what"s up?" his work mate says,
  • "Well, I had this really embarrassing Freudian slip this morning!"
  • The bloke asks what a Freudian slip is and his pal explains that it"s when you mean to say something but what you actually say is what you"re thinking.
  • He then gives his example: -"I was queueing at the train station ticket office and couldn"t help but notice that the girl behind the counter has a massive pair of hooters. They were real eye magnets! When I got to the window, instead of asking for a ticket to Tooting I asked her for a ticket to TITTING.
  • She blushed, I blushed, I got my ticket and scarpered".
  • The bloke laughs and says "Oh, I see. That"s funny!".
  • The following day, the other bloke is sitting at his desk laughing to himself when his workmate walks in and asks, "what"s so funny?"
  • The bloke replies, "I had one of your Freudian slips this morning. I was sitting at the breakfast table with the missus and I meant to say "pass the marmalade" but what I actually said was "F*CK OFF, YOU FAT BITCH, YOU"VE RUINED MY LIFE!"
 
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