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Off Topic Jokes thread

Discussion in 'Portsmouth' started by devonFRATTONiser, Jan 25, 2015.

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  1. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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    #30821
    antipodean exile, Jun 7, 2024
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    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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    #30822
    antipodean exile, Jun 7, 2024
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    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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    antipodean exile, Jun 7, 2024
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    antipodean exile, Jun 7, 2024
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    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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    antipodean exile, Jun 7, 2024
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  6. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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    antipodean exile, Jun 7, 2024
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  7. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #30827
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 7, 2024
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    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    A man was arrested yesterday after he fell into a combine harvester while trying to steal it !!!

    He's due to be bailed tomorrow !!
     
    #30828
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 7, 2024
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  9. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Just started a boat making business in my loft and it's doing really well....

    Sails have gone through the roof....
     
    #30829
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 7, 2024
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  10. antipodean exile

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  11. antipodean exile

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    antipodean exile, Jun 8, 2024
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    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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    antipodean exile, Jun 8, 2024
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    antipodean exile, Jun 8, 2024
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  15. antipodean exile

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    As the bus pulled up at the bus stop and it was her turn to get on, Melissa became aware that her skirt was too tight to allow her leg to raise to the height of the first step of the bus:
    Slightly embarrassed and with a quick smile to the bus driver, she reached behind herself to unzip her skirt a little, thinking that this would give her enough slack to raise her leg. She tried to take the step, only to discover that she still couldn't.
    So, a little more embarrassed, she once again reached behind her to unzip her skirt a little more, and for the third time attempted the step.
    Once again, much to her dismay, she could not raise her leg. With a little smile to the driver, she again reached behind to unzip a little more and again was unable to take the step.
    At this point, a large bodybuilder who was standing behind her picked her up easily by the waist and placed her gently on the step of the bus.
    She went ballistic and turned to the would-be Samaritan and yelled. "How dare you touch my body! I don't even know who you are..!!??"
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    The bodybuilder smiled and drawled. "Well, ma'am, normally I would agree with you, but after you unzipped my fly three times, I kinda figured we was friends..!!"
     
    #30835
    antipodean exile, Jun 8, 2024
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  16. antipodean exile

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    antipodean exile, Jun 8, 2024
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