Caption competition

AA: Son. Where's the crowd?
EH: Dad. I've spoken to the ref. He's delaying the kick-off.
AA: What until we've pissed off?

 

EH: NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA Ehab! NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA Ehab! Ehaaab. Ehaaab. Batmaaaan. I mean Ehab!

AA: ...How is this **** my son?

EH: Did you say something?

AA: No, no. You carry on....****.

 

Ehab: What did Bruce say when he finally quit?
Assem: He said it was time to walk like an Egyptian.

 

EA : Papa, tell me the story of how you were tortured and then escaped from Egypt?
AA : Well, my precious **** of a son, it was like this. I'd lied and cheated and ****ed so many people about, there was nothing for it but to come to England start all over and do the same again, I was so good at it.
EA : What happened in Egypt, though?
AA : **** all really, my chosen one, I lied about that too.
EA : OH!

 

I told you there'd come a time when you wouldn't hear the fans singing 'Allam out'

 

AA: ****s sake..I asked if my test results are back.
EA Sorry dad, I thought you said. Are my testicles black?

 

I don't get it. Look at the photo's from the meeting, and the Americans seemed happy enough with us.

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AA: Its time to do it son.
EA: What's that dad?
AA: Call, Rent-a-Crowd.

 

"Which team is ours again?"

 

I said get rid of that BRUISE .... not get rid of BRUCE you stupid little ****.

 

Dad.....if they hang us they will need a thick rope for me....you are a shade lighter.....

 

Daddy when the mob lynch me will you bury me in a pyramid?

 

AA: did you remember to include the stadium management company?
EA: the stadium what? You said we didn't own the stadium!
AA: ah well, when you meet them tomorrow, just mention it and ask for about 6m, the stupid t***ts won't even notice....

 

You were adopted.
Your real dad is 1970s magician Ali Bongo.