Off Topic And Now for Something Completely Different

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Chazz Rheinhold said:
People say don’t **** on your own doorstep !! but after 10 pints and a large doner last night, I was too pissed to find my door keys and frankly, I’d like to know what the alternative was.
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A bit Carminesque this Chazz. Although at least he made the bathroom.



And I'll say it before anyone else does; why didn't you ask Large Donna to find your door keys before you got home.
 
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I've just found myself on Google maps. I'm that white dot. Fun, and also a little concerning.

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Mr Hatem said:
Hiding in the bushes, perving?
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A bit, yeah. It's a proper wind free, sun-trap just there. If the summer sun is out that's where my wife and I will be, sweating our arses off. It's where there's red kites, sparrowhawks, dragonflies, voles, chickens and a stupid dog. It's where nothing else matters for a few hours and it's ****ing bliss.

Although, now I know that some twat's taking photo's of me from above, I'm going to bury those bitches at night from now on.
 
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Mr Hatem said:
Spain's Balearic Islands have passed a law banning pub crawls and happy hours in three popular tourist destinations in a bid to crack down on alcohol-fuelled holidays.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-51158258
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[HASHTAG]#SozChazz[/HASHTAG]
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Good. I’m too old for the them anyway!!
I want relaxation & medium priced booze when I’m in palma & Ibiza......4 weeks until I’m there!!!!
 
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Right Guys.......you won't be hearing from me for a while.........the police are investigating me for stealing a job lot of swimming pool inflatables..... so I’ve got to lilo....
 
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