Got to say, comparisons to Beardo et al are hilarious!
He doesn't have pace, or much skill, but he is a decent finisher, and not too bad at crossing either.
Best comparison for me is Rooney. If he can become a player who steps up at crucial moments, he'll be invaluable whatever league we're in, otherwise he'll be a bit like the older version of Rooney... Bit of a passenger.
Looking at the championship, we'll most likely lose Gini and Perez, so Armstrong would fit straight in.
If we stayed up, he'll end up on loan again.
Rooney was recorded as one of the 10 fastest players in the world last season IIRC, I think he must have spotted a leathery old weasel in the crowd flashing a bit of bra and his natural instinct kicked in.
Aye but Paul Dummett has been recorded this season as the fastest. Therefore I can only assume their machine is ****ed.
He was probably running away from Adam Johnson at the time, he's only young innit?
He was probably running away from Adam Johnson at the time, he's only young innit?
Rooney was recorded as one of the 10 fastest players in the world last season IIRC, I think he must have spotted a leathery old weasel in the crowd flashing a bit of bra and his natural instinct kicked in.
Just fed up of the usual negativity

What the actual ****?Rooney was recorded as one of the 10 fastest players in the world last season IIRC, I think he must have spotted a leathery old weasel in the crowd flashing a bit of bra and his natural instinct kicked in.

That will be difficult after getting thumped by an awful Chelsea side and sitting in the bottom 3
What the actual ****?
Is that true? He looks like he's running in a tar-pit... and I have yet to see a modern era sprint team with a chubby balding fat white guy who wasn't simply a hilarious mascot,,,
True mate. Even the granny bit.
He's in this years EPL fastest 10 as well. Martial and Vardy top the list.
I think he's fast like a bus would be if it was driven off a cliff, takes a few seconds to get going, poor acceleration.

****ing hell... I trust the physicists are working on explaining this next!
I'd have thought the likes of Walcott, Clyne, the Ox, Sanchez, Bellerin, Sturridge's ambulance, Firmino, Routledge, Dyer, Van Aanholt, Defoe would have been easily faster, and maybe even the Long's, anndd lazy bastard Sissoko's. It shall from now on be known as Wayne Rooney's Warp Drive. Let's hope the lass doesn't get hold of it to describe my deceptively rapid bedroom performances![]()