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Seeing as I'm by far the most handsome and intelligent hun on here, and still the boss of the minor plebs, is anyone able to give me a 10 word summary to what I've missed? I already know that venom looks like Mrs potato head so no need to remind me of that ridiculously disgusting factoid.

Guessing I'll be the only one from here at the game tonight? Hoping for a good spot to watch from where I won't be bothered by anyone with cut fingers or more likely, frostbite. Safe to say I'm not expecting much from the game.

Known worldwide http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-29929333 Ah wid

I think he should head over to France. Apparently Dijon is nice around now. http://www.france24.com/en/20141024-france-armed-clowns-scary-pranks-bethune-police-arrest/

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-kent-28313483 Isn't chapper from Kent? :bandit:

Can't be too difficult to tell if someones been stabbed or shot <doh> http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-birmingham-28160654

British burd in Magaluf giving 24 'blowjobs' in 2 and a half minutes for a £2 bottle of cava...

If you don't have a coral account, you can put up to £10 on Brazil to wear yellow tonight at 2/1. Price only available to new customers. You get a £20 free bet as well, which I have put on Brazil -1 tonight. Looking at getting £45 returns for my tenner deposited.

The business end of ma boaby.....that's what the missus will be receiving tonight.

Just looking at the odds for this Saturdays game on Bet365, and they surely have made a mistake. Rangers 13/5 Dundee United - 19/20 Doubling up your money near enough for what must be seen as a certainty? I'm even tempted to bet on them handicapped. One DU player in a wheelchair - 9/4 Two...

I had my stag do at the weekend there in Liverpool, and I'm pretty much a broken man now. Anyway, what kind of things happened on all your stag do's? I almost choked on a strippers massive nipples, and licked whipped cream from her crack :emoticon-0103-cool: Can't remember anything after...

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Some South Korean burd got plastic surgery to give herself a 'heart shaped face'. Ah still wid <ok>

Looks like we're all going to have to agree on a new meeting place for the gangbang tonight <wah> http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-glasgow-west-25668020

Same question as per the scriptoid http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-25636948 Ah wid

Off to the Dominican Republic for two weeks in May <ok> Any you ****s been before? It takes 3.5 hours to get from the airport to my hotel.

****e of the day. That's what I'm about to go and do.

Noticed you have a position available, I'm interested. Can I forward you my CV? If you go for someone else, pick Ilvana <ok> ah wid

I'm in charge of the toilet cleaning department at BP and fired an employee 7 or 8 weeks ago for being a turd burglar. The problem is, he still hangs around the place. He's mentally disabled, so I'm trying to get rid of him for good in a sensitive manner. Any ideas on how to go about this?

Reading about the charity match yesterday and noticed a BBC cock up under the picture of McNamara and Terry. http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/24013795 How long ago did McNamara leave Partick for Dundee United? Proof (if any was needed) that the BBC is run by *****s and can not be...