The Christmas Thread

Christmas is my favourite time of the year, I like it.

 

And me Matth, great time of year.

 

I like Christmas. It's when the elf comes to visit.

 

Someone should write a song about it.

 

Saw a house with the Christmas tree up and all alight tonight. FFS it's only the 16th November.

 

Jehovah's Witness have got it right. Jesus was born in Autumn.

 

" The Fall of Jesus "

 

Although I'd swap great for wonderful myself, it's got a nicer ring to it.

 

Worst Christmas joke ever ( I know , I made it up )
What did Santa say when he stopped his sleigh and greeted a hooker and offered her a cream filled chocolate snack .
Ho , ho ho ho ...ho , ho ho ?....well I said it was bad , I'll get my coat ....

 

... bit more specific please...do you mean according to the Julian calendar or pre dating that?

 

According to Albert, the Jehovas witness I used to debate with. He used to enjoy Kipling's Angel slices and a cuppa. So I used to buy a box for his monthly visit.

 

Was doing a shop for xmas a couple years ago and saw a cheese that I had never heard of. It was called THISPIECE Cheddar
I picked it up checked the price , and wondered where Thispiece was.
After a couple of minutes Mrs RCL and my 2 girls caught up with me and pissed themselves laughing at me.
The label was saying THIS PIECE Cheddar £1.99 but who ever type it forgot to hit the space bar between the words.
Teach me to get all poncey

 

Went shopping in a shopping centre last week to get a present for my daughter's 19th birthday. 6th November and the whole centre was decorated for xmas and all the shops were playing Xmas songs...those decorations will be up for around 2 months ... two ****ing months...that's a ****ing 6th of the entire year...nearly 17 ****ing percent of the year
... that's a ****ing load of Xmas for all the grinchy baa humbug mo fos on this thread

 

Santa Claus has got nothing to do with Christmas which lol has got nothing to do with Jesus....anyway back to Santa. It was an invention of Coca Cola lol.

 

Of all the people to start a Christmas thread in mid- November I didnt think it would be you.

I know it was you Fredo, I know it was you.

 

Actually 'Sinta Claus' was bought to America by Dutch settlers in the 1730's it wasn't used by Coca Cola until 1931. Just saying like.

 

...fcukin maths teachers ...no wonder they get the 'odd' sock lobbed at them ...

 

He became red and white because of Coca Cola...not because of Jesus.

 

I'm a miserable **** by default.

This thread should cheer all up.

 

Has Christmas finished yet?