Shearer's ebar

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Obi Wan said:
<laugh><laugh>
Geet fat knacka!
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I really am <laugh>

In my defence I've started to try and do something about it. I'm designing a website for a local gym and we came to a deal where he gets it for a discount and I get 12 sessions with the personal trainer. It only lasts 6 weeks before I need to start doing it on my own but hopefully it will be the kick-start I need. I'm half way through the sessions now and it's embarrassing how unfit I am. I feel like crap even doing the basics during each session.
 
TheJudeanPeoplesFront said:
Yay!!! On the cusp of being invited to a dust-up with Teeside Mackem... It's been so long

[HASHTAG]#propermeltdown[/HASHTAG]
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Would be funny if you did fella. I mean you won't because it's over the internet. But he'd hit you that fast you'd think you're surrounded, his hand speed and explosiveness is scary. I wouldn't **** with him, even though I'm twice his size.

Ultimately neither of you covered yourselves in glory there. You should both have a word with yourselves. Him offering out over the net and you laying into his father(who isn't well at the moment)

You should both have a word with yourselves. You're both better then that.
 
Funky Dick said:
Would be funny if you did fella. I mean you won't because it's over the internet. But he'd hit you that fast you'd think you're surrounded, his hand speed and explosiveness is scary. I wouldn't **** with him, even though I'm twice his size.

Ultimately neither of you covered yourselves in glory there. You should both have a word with yourselves. Him offering out over the net and you laying into his father(who isn't well at the moment)

You should both have a word with yourselves. You're both better then that.
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<laugh> yeah ok Don King, whatever... TeesideMayweather <laugh><laugh><laugh>
 
Beardsley's Shimmy said:
It's like Royston Vasey on their board.
If you are a Mackem and disagree with the consensus you are a mag on the wum,
If you are a mag they wanna fight you (apart from the two pet mags they have in Wij and Cardew)- the latter of the two they have' twigged is a previously banned user <laugh>
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<laugh> I wish I was cool enough to have the level of prestige on here to be a renowned 'mag twat'.
 
TheJudeanPeoplesFront said:
<laugh> yeah ok Don King, whatever... TeesideMayweather <laugh><laugh><laugh>
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Wrong weight category by a mile. Boxing background family mate. Not so sure why you think people online can't be tough ****ers. There's all walks of life online and people keeping themselves in peak condition is ten a penny these days. The naivety is all yours fella. ;)
 
Just to recap for my spinning heed this evening.
Feel free to correct me if I'm misguided in my aspersions...

The Mackems have finally sussed it and now have unrefutable proof that both JPF and Monty are residing in the slums of Pennywell.

For a mackem this of course means that JPF is Monty and by some cruel trick of fate, that Monty is JPF?

The mind boggles at the prospect for the majority of sane people, but Mackems, being Mackems will of course believe what they want to believe.....so if anyone isn't sure, its quite clear that JPF may be Monty and Monty may indeed be JPF.

Next up - A random Mackem offers JPF and the courageous CaptainChaos out for a fight for some bizarre reason, and then it turns out he's actually a confused Smoggie.

JPF then suggests Northumberland Street as a meeting place, and before you have a chance to digest events, all seems to be well as JPF and the Captain, now appear to be notches on said Smoggies Bed Post.

Straightforward.....that even I get it
 
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Funky Dick said:
Wrong weight category by a mile. Boxing background family mate. Not so sure why you think people online can't be tough ****ers. There's all walks of life online and people keeping themselves in peak condition is ten a penny these days. The naivety is all yours fella. ;)
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Tell him to meet me naked at Northumberland street then <laugh>
 
I have to say mind JPF, in terms of the piss taking out of TeessideMayfeather, CaptainChaos wiped the floor with you. The poor smoggie had no idea how to deal with his eclectic humour. I don't think he should have been banned mind, we need people like that to pop in when they've had a drink, line or shot up.

He has probably secured a place in the top 5 worst WUM attempts. If you carrying that much rage around, you really should keep your head beneath the parapet.
 
Reet **** faces. Just to let you know ive done a thread on our board. Its an exchange and mart/trader type thing.

So anything you want to sell. Swap. Giveaway or looking for. Feel free to have some input.

And **** with your chinos. Strap ons and 5-1 match day programs.

Hopefully some of you will make use of the thread and maybe make a few quid.

Ta.
 
commachio1 said:
Reet **** faces. Just to let you know ive done a thread on our board. Its an exchange and mart/trader type thing.

So anything you want to sell. Swap. Giveaway or looking for. Feel free to have some input.

And **** with your chinos. Strap ons and 5-1 match day programs.

Hopefully some of you will make use of the thread and maybe make a few quid.

Ta.
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Just to clarify. All chino's or certain coloured ones?
 
Speaking of fight clubs has anyone seen the youtube footage of that nut job Ronnie Pickering?
Just google it....
A bloke from Hull who offers out an innocent moped rider for a bare knuckle fight.
'do you know who I am?'... is his catchphrase.
It's worth 5 mins of your time as you will cry with laughter at him.
 
Albert's Chip Shop said:
Speaking of fight clubs has anyone seen the youtube footage of that nut job Ronnie Pickering?
Just google it....
A bloke from Hull who offers out an innocent moped rider for a bare knuckle fight.
'do you know who I am?'... is his catchphrase.
It's worth 5 mins of your time as you will cry with laughter at him.
Click to expand...
I don't have time to waste on your idiotic ideas. Do you not know who I am?
 
Good news!!!

I am proposing a new game for the Derby, Toon posters vs Mackem posters. The rules?

1. There are 15 questions relating to the derby match. Each must be answered by a Toon fan and a Mackem fan.
2. Each fan is permitted to answer ONE question only.
3. There is no rule suggesting that a Newcastle or Sunderland fan must predict a positive result for their team, or be consistent with the other answers.
4. The higher the points total at the end carries forum predicting bragging rights, the losers must accept they are inferior patsies of the lowest order.
5. The answers are submitted on first come first serve basis. So if Obi picks to answer which team will get the first goal kick, and then ACS also wanted to answer that, we wouldn't let ACS' prediction override Obi just because he is cooler <ok>
6. Copying is allowed. So if a Mackem fan says the score will be 33-0 to Newcastle, a Newcastle fan can agree with the logic and obvious nature of the prediction and also say 33-0.

First Goalscorer (5 pts if you select the correct player, 3 only if you select the correct side, 0 if you get both wrong)?

Final Score? (3 points for spot on, 1 point for getting the right result, 0 otherwise)

First goal minute? (1 point for the closest guess)

Number of corners? (1 point for closest guess)

Which team will get the first goal-kick? (1 point)

Which team will get the first yellow? (1 point)

Which player will get the first yellow? (3 points if correct, 0 if not)

Which team will get the most yellows? (1 point)

Which team will have the highest number of shots on target? (1 point)

Which team will make the first substitute? (1 point)

Which team will make the last substitute? (1 point)

Which player will get man of the match? (5 points if spot on, 3 points if you select the correct team, 0 otherwise)

Which player will have the highest pass success rate? (1 point)

Which player will score the winning goal? (3 points. Winning goal defined as 1 more than the opposition)

Which player will be sent off first? (5 points for spot on, 3 points if you select the right side, 0 otherwise)
 
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