Shearer's ebar

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Steve Sidwell?

 

What happened last night? I got kicked out of the site and couldn't log back in. Looks like there was lots of duplicate posting too.

 

more gremlins mate, now sorted.

 

erm... nah lol.

 

So did Karen ever actually have red hair? Or was she fooling you and using that wig to lure you in?

 

Think she did, she got it cut off charity I believe, like Jessie J did for Comic Relief.

 

I bet ACS bought her hair for a fair sum to support that charity!

 

Sorry lads I've been away a bit today sniffing this... oh wait.

 

He's lying we were sick of ya ****e

 

That's more like it! Tell it as it is! I have more respect fir that, ya ******

 

I have to admit I am a complete ******

 

Oh so now you're a complete ****** are you? Think you're the best ****** out there do you? What a big-headed complete and utter ******!

 

Again?

 

This is all too much for my virgin ears.

 

I hope your ears remain virgin, or else you are into some seriously weird s**t.

 

What did you say, I can't hear you.

 

Lads, gather round for the most depressing tale of all time...

I was determined to follow ACS' advice, only less sexually aggressively, with regards sandwich girl. I steeled myself to ask her out every single day this week, walking past where she works about 5/6 times a day. Considering there's only toilet facilities nearby, the other staff there must think I've got the runs. Anyway, it got to thursday and it started pissing me off that she wasn't in... do I really want to date a slacker? So by friday I was set, if she doesn't come in, f*** it, she's missed her chance. She didn't come in. My mates were as bemused as me (she's been there like 1 month, she can't have a week holiday, it just didn't make sense), so I employed them to act on my behalf on their breaks. They found out her first name (WHAT F***ING USE IS THAT GUYS?!?!?!?!) and that she was in a horrible accident at work (which immediately gave me a sinister smile... Who else is going to love a mangled freak? Now it's all about how much damage is done and whether I'm now too good for her I'm joking, relax). So, after work, I creeped (correct description) round to her work and looked at the rota to take down her name, and added her on facebook.

Unfortunately, she accepted immediately, which meant the 4/5 statuses about a "hot girl" in the sandwich shop, my intentions, and the fact she wasn't in for ages, weren't successfully pushed to the bottom of my page by a few minutes frenetic status posting.... The highlight of these 4/5 statuses, involved me, as a joke, saying I'd refer to her by the name "Julia" because I was worried I'd say "sandwich girl" in front of her at some point, and getting her name mixed with someone else's might at worst make her think "Who is Julia???"... Because I'm so obviously a player...

Anyway... I sent her a message, asking after her. She replied with one sentence and left the conversation. BYE BYE FREE F***ING SANDWICHES.

 

Guess you shouldn't be too surprised about that.

 

Stalkie mcstalkerson.

Message her asking for a locket of her hair.. That should weird her out a bit. Then tell her you know where she lives.