Marcus Evans thought he had a CULT following, then he realised it was Paul Jewell and a spelling mistake!
Marcus Evans thought he had a CULT following, then he realised it was Paul Jewell and a spelling mistake!
Do you know the difference between Jeremy Forrest and Stevie Wonder? Both Stevie Wonder's pupils were fcuked!
The good news is, Megan Stammers has passed her Maths Oral. She remembered how many times 30 went into 15.
Three Irishmen are sitting in the pub window seat, Watching the front door of the brothel over the road. The local Methodist pastor appears, and quickly goes inside. "Would you look at that!" says the first Irishman. "Didn't I always say what a bunch of hypocrites they are?" No sooner are the words out of his mouth than a Rabbi appears at the door, Knocks, and goes inside. "Another one trying to fool everyone with pious preaching and stupid hats!" They continue drinking their beer roundly condemning the vicar and the rabbi When they see their own Catholic priest knock on the door. "Ah, now dat's sad." says the third Irishman. "One of the girls must have died.”
This is indeed the ultimate plan!** **It could work!***** You gotta love Robin Williams........ Even if he's nuts! Leave it to Robin Williams to come up with the perfect plan. What we need now is for our UN Ambassador to stand up and repeat this message.**** Robin Williams' plan...(Hard to argue with thislogic!)***** 'I see a lot of people yelling for peace but I have not heard of a plan for peace. So, here's one plan.'***** 1) 'The US, UK , CANADA , New Zealand and AUSTRALIA will apologize to the world for our 'interference' in their affairs, past & present. You know, Hitler, Mussolini, Stalin Tojo, Noriega, Milosevic, Hussein, and the rest of those 'good 'ole' boys', we will never 'interfere' again.***** 2) We will withdraw our troops from all over the world, starting with Germany , South Korea , the Middle East , and the Philippines .. They don't want us there. We would station troops at our borders. No one allowed sneaking through holes in the fence.***** 3) All illegal aliens have 90 days to get their affairs together and leave We'll give them a free trip home. After 90 days the remainder will be gathered up and deported immediately, regardless of whom or where they are from. They're illegal!!! France will welcome them.***** 4) All future visitors will be thoroughly checked and limited to 90 days unless given a special permit!!!! No one from a terrorist nation will be allowed in. If you don't like it there, change it yourself and don't hide here. Asylum would never be available to anyone. We don't need any more cab drivers or 7-11 cashiers.***** 5) No foreign 'students' over age 21. The older ones are the bombers. If they don't attend classes, they get a 'D' and it's back home baby.***** 6) The US, UK , CANADA , New Zealand and AUSTRALIA will make a strong effort to become self-sufficient energy wise. This will include developing nonpolluting sources of energy but will require a temporary drilling of oil in the Alaskan wilderness. The caribou will have to cope for a while***** 7) Offer Saudi Arabia and other oil producing countries $10 a barrel for their oil. If they don't like it, we go someplace else. They can go somewhere else to sell their production. (About a week of the wells filling up the storage sites would be enough.)***** 8) If there is a famine or other natural catastrophe in the world, we will not 'interfere.' They can pray to Allah or whomever, for seeds, rain, cement or whatever they need. Besides most of what we give them is stolen or given to the army. The people who need it most get very little, if anything.***** 9) Ship the UN Headquarters to an isolated island someplace. We don't need the spies and fair weather friends here. Besides, the building would make a good homeless shelter or lockup for illegal aliens.***** 10) All Americans must go to charm and beauty school. That way, no one can call us 'Ugly Americans' any longer. The Language we speak is ENGLISH..learn it..or LEAVE...Now, isn't that a winner of a plan?***** 'The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying 'Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses.' She's got a baseball bat and she's yelling, 'you want a piece of me?' '*****
