A farmer in Norfolk has perfected the art of growing vibrators. He says he doesn't have any trouble growing hem his biggest problem is squatters.
I went to a pub yesterday evening and ordered a pint. As the landlord put my drink down, I asked him for the wifi code because I needed to check a message. "Oh no" he said, "No wifi in here, people used to sit talking in pubs, about their day, their families, work, politics, music, the lot. Now people just stare at their phones and it breaks my heart to see. Therefore, no wifi in this pub." "You know what?" I replied, "You're right" and I put my phone away. "Thank you", the landlord said "In this pub I want you to act as you would twenty years ago". So I lit a cigarette, gave him 50p for the pint and said "Two can play at that game mate."
Elvis Costello the buddy Holly lookalike has fallen on hard times he's now working as a supervisor in a biscuit factory......where he's "watching the digestives"
you forgot to take a for that one however its still please log in to view this image but never mind i still like you