The Gardening Thread

Piskie's carrot is more of a chantenay ... allegedly

 

Wid

 

Lazy bastard

 

Stick a bamboo stick in the centre of the pot and tie the stem to it. Tomato plant stems are droopier than Fosse's cock the morning after fresher's week.

 

Dont think im patient enough fir this gardening lark tbh, keep checkingbthem every day like cmon ffs

 

You kidding bro, bamboo grows about a foot per day nothing will compete with that

 

You should've started with cress in cotton wool mate

Tbh tomatos are one of the easiest things to grow. Do it man!

 

Fosse just needs a sprinkle of miracle gro

 

I'm talking about the stuff you get in B&Q Diego, not your fcking escapades against the Viet Cong 50 years ago ffs!

 

Mixing me up with Comm mate but i get the B&Q reference, anything from their garden section is dead anyway.

 

It's basically a cheap support for any potted plant.

And don't lie, you still having flashbacks about that **** going under the finger nails?

 

Confession, i already knew that

 

Confession, I used to swing them about like Zorro, when one of those fckers caught you it fcking hurt

 

@Skylarker does that for fun bruv

 

Did you have a headmaster at junior school who got some kind of kick out of it?
I did, "this hurts me more than it will hurt you" batard

 

Bamboo is a mutant alright

I once had some that grew right up in the middle of a neighbours living room when I was up the jungle

true story