Who is thickest EPL player

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pabird

Active Member
May 2, 2011
268
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In terms of the football brain as opposed to basic life style intelligence who would you consider the EPL dummy

Walcott has to be close if not a (fast) run-away winner :emoticon-0116-evilg
 
I know he's not in the EPL, but Xavi accidentally referred to Man Utd as Leeds United after last season's Champions League Final. <doh>
 
Steve Harper once described Steven Taylor as, and i quote "the thickest man he has ever met..."

But for me it would be someone like Bramble. if you're being nicked on a consistent basis for sexual assault and getting away with it you really ought to quit while you're ahead. Nile Ranger (newcastle reserve striker ) is also a slavering spastic as well as a total ****er.
 
Rooney is B+, but his main talents are...

Kicking people!

I happen to think the spread between thick players and clever players matches the general UK population. The **** tend to float to the surface, which is why they are easily spotted.

All players who said "I joined Liverpool to win trophies" should be added to the list.
 
I remember on Soccer AM when Lennon was doing the team mates section and was asked who the close clever member of the spurs squad was he replied;
"Gomes probably as he wears glasses!!!"
Therefore I'm throwing his name into the hat too
 
I must confess that I am not impressed by Barton as a person, and assumed that was connected to lack of intellect. However I should say that having heard him on 5 Live over the weekend, I must reassess my opinion. I still don't like him as a person but he's clearly not thick, he made a lot of sense in fact and was rather more honest in his replies than most of the non-replies you get from other premiership footballers.

Obviously biased but it seems to me that Spurs players are clearly more intelligent than average. Tony Galvin had a Russian degree didn't he and wasn't Ossie a qualified lawyer? Friedel did well on MOTD2 as well a few weeks back.
 
I remember on Soccer AM when Lennon was doing the team mates section and was asked who the close clever member of the spurs squad was he replied;
"Gomes probably as he wears glasses!!!"
Therefore I'm throwing his name into the hat too

That'd explain a few of Gomes' clangers.

Essien's pretty stupid, I met him about a year ago and was telling him my flatmate is from Ghana and he didn't understand a word except "Accra" and his mate had to translate everything I said.

Not sure whether it's thick or just lazy to not be able to speak English after 5/6 years in the country.
 
Wilshere's just a bog standard, Jeremy Kyle appearing chav, as far as I can tell.
He's probably on the list of Premier League footballers that would be in jail if they didn't have a talent for kicking a ball.

Tevez?
Lived in England for five years and three clubs, yet still can't speak the language.

I'm sure that there are a few smart footballers out there, though.
Shaka Hislop has a degree in mechanical engineering from Howard University in the USA, graduating with honours and acting as an intern at NASA.
 
His investments weren't stupid though, Croydon.
He owns a ton of property.
 
Tevez not learning English after so long here is terrible. That is probably the main reason he doesn't like our country.