Us V Middlesbrough Match Thread

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Stringer (being a cocky *****) - "Kevin Phillips appeared on a television show this morning and stated that he is talking to a side in the midlands. Now i'm no master of geography, but you're a side in the midlands. Is he talking to Leicester City?"

Nige - "Well Ian, if you go get your map out and read it you'll see there are plenty of cities with plenty of football teams in the midlands".


Stringer - "Is it you though?"

Nige - "Maybe. But maybe not. You'll have to wait and see I suppose".


:emoticon-0118-yawn:
you must be so proud!
 
It is written, Lloydy.



It gave us legendary comedic characters such as Skipper the Eyechild and Dr Rick Dagless.

So **** you.

"He whisked off her shoes and panties in one movement, wild like an enraged shark, his bulky totem beating a seductive rhythm. Mary's body felt like it was burning, even though the room was properly air-conditioned. They tried all the positions: on top, doggy, and normal. Exhausted, they collapsed on to the recently extended sofa bed. Then a hellbeast ate them."
 
"He whisked off her shoes and panties in one movement, wild like an enraged shark, his bulky totem beating a seductive rhythm. Mary's body felt like it was burning, even though the room was properly air-conditioned. They tried all the positions: on top, doggy, and normal. Exhausted, they collapsed on to the recently extended sofa bed. Then a hellbeast ate them."

"Greetings traveler. I'm Garth Marenghi, horror writer. Most of you will probably know me already from my extensive canon of chillers, including Afterbirth, in which a mutated placenta attacks Bristol. Back in the 1980s, I wrote, directed and starred in Garth Marenghi's Darkplace, a television program so radical, so risky, so dangerous, so goddamn crazy, that the so-called powers that be became too scared to show it, and gypped me. Much in the same way women have done ever since they sniffed out my money"
 
"Greetings traveler. I'm Garth Marenghi, horror writer. Most of you will probably know me already from my extensive canon of chillers, including Afterbirth, in which a mutated placenta attacks Bristol. Back in the 1980s, I wrote, directed and starred in Garth Marenghi's Darkplace, a television program so radical, so risky, so dangerous, so goddamn crazy, that the so-called powers that be became too scared to show it, and gypped me. Much in the same way women have done ever since they sniffed out my money"

<laugh> Possibly the best intro to a series ever.

Also has the best voice (Sanchez) in television.
 
I never find a City match boring. This one was no different. Boro looked poor and we just kept them at arm's length really.

Some **** in the boro end had a drum. A few of our fans were doing a daft banging on seats followed by cheesy hysterical cheering routine to take the piss but their lot didn't even realise and did it back at us. It was really bizarre the two sets of fans taking it in turns to do it.

City til we die universally belted out again. Just like at WBA none of the silent majority turned up.

We learnt very little from that game: everyone did reasonably well. Boyd looked dangerous, Proschwitz took his goal well but was otherwise ****, Quinn and Meyler did everything well. Figueroa was responsible for their two best chances with big errors. It was all the usual stuff really. Our second goal was good though.
 
"He whisked off her shoes and panties in one movement, wild like an enraged shark, his bulky totem beating a seductive rhythm. Mary's body felt like it was burning, even though the room was properly air-conditioned. They tried all the positions: on top, doggy, and normal. Exhausted, they collapsed on to the recently extended sofa bed. Then a hellbeast ate them."

**** me, I thought I'd had a **** afternoon! <yikes>
 
**** me, I thought I'd had a **** afternoon!

Dagless: The cabin crew suggested we all go out and club it. I had no option. It was that or one of their B&Bs. I figured it'd be safer on the streets. For the first time ever I saw the Scotch in their natural habitat, and it weren't pretty. I'd seen them huddling in stations before, being loud but&#8230; this time I was surrounded. Everywhere I went it felt like they were watching me; fish-white flesh puckered by the Highland breeze; tight eyes peering out for fresh meat; screechy, booze-soaked voices hollering out for a taxi to take 'em halfway up the road to the next all-night watering hole. A shatter of glass; a round of applause; a sixteen-year-old mother of three vomiting in an open sewer, bairns looking on, chewing on potato cakes. I ain&#8217;t never going back&#8230; not never.

Sanchez: My aunt lives in Scotland; she says it's quite nice.

Dagless: Well, she's wrong.
 
Dagless: The cabin crew suggested we all go out and club it. I had no option. It was that or one of their B&Bs. I figured it'd be safer on the streets. For the first time ever I saw the Scotch in their natural habitat, and it weren't pretty. I'd seen them huddling in stations before, being loud but&#8230; this time I was surrounded. Everywhere I went it felt like they were watching me; fish-white flesh puckered by the Highland breeze; tight eyes peering out for fresh meat; screechy, booze-soaked voices hollering out for a taxi to take 'em halfway up the road to the next all-night watering hole. A shatter of glass; a round of applause; a sixteen-year-old mother of three vomiting in an open sewer, bairns looking on, chewing on potato cakes. I ain&#8217;t never going back&#8230; not never.

Sanchez: My aunt lives in Scotland; she says it's quite nice.

Dagless: Well, she's wrong.

Here, have this shortbread. Sorry I don't have any salt to go with that.
 
Adrian Chiles said before the Arsenal-Spurs game that Leeds losing was the biggest upset of the day.


Bollocks, Villa losing at home to Sheff Utd is the biggest upset today.
 
Macca Is God:5862316 said:
Adrian Chiles said before the Arsenal-Spurs game that Leeds losing was the biggest upset of the day.


Bollocks, Villa losing at home to Sheff Utd is the biggest upset today.

Media obsession with Leeds' history again. They used to be good so them losing a game now is a huge upset? Deary me.