Two new signings imminent according to NUFC.com

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Saw this on another board, dont know if its true but it made laugh my T*TS off. Enjoy!!


*Last week there was a meeting scheduled in the evening with Pardew and others to discuss the clubs PR.
Joe got pissed up on the train on the way there, He was mortal in the meeting.
The next morning he then phoned Pardew to ask when the meeting was.
He couldn't remember being at it.

*Then later in the day he sat down with Pardew and Carr to discuss transfer targets, He went into a drunken rant about foreign strikers and claimed we should sign Carlton Cole who he reckons scored 17 goals last season when in fact he scored twice.

*He has met Darren Bent, drunk again.
Bent and his people walked out of the room.

*Ashley is considering removing him as DOF.

It's on twitter so it must be true XD
 
Saw this on another board, dont know if its true but it made laugh my T*TS off. Enjoy!!


*Last week there was a meeting scheduled in the evening with Pardew and others to discuss the clubs PR.
Joe got pissed up on the train on the way there, He was mortal in the meeting.
The next morning he then phoned Pardew to ask when the meeting was.
He couldn't remember being at it.

*Then later in the day he sat down with Pardew and Carr to discuss transfer targets, He went into a drunken rant about foreign strikers and claimed we should sign Carlton Cole who he reckons scored 17 goals last season when in fact he scored twice.

*He has met Darren Bent, drunk again.
Bent and his people walked out of the room.

*Ashley is considering removing him as DOF.

It's on twitter so it must be true XD

Well to be fair of all the stories i've heard about Kinnear this was definitely the one that i believed most
 
I wish this was true, but I suspect no matter how pissed Kinnear gets, Ashley will let him stay. I still believe Kinnear is only here to force Pardew out with his ****ing pathetic behaviour

Saw this on another board, dont know if its true but it made laugh my T*TS off. Enjoy!!


*Last week there was a meeting scheduled in the evening with Pardew and others to discuss the clubs PR.
Joe got pissed up on the train on the way there, He was mortal in the meeting.
The next morning he then phoned Pardew to ask when the meeting was.
He couldn't remember being at it.

*Then later in the day he sat down with Pardew and Carr to discuss transfer targets, He went into a drunken rant about foreign strikers and claimed we should sign Carlton Cole who he reckons scored 17 goals last season when in fact he scored twice.

*He has met Darren Bent, drunk again.
Bent and his people walked out of the room.

*Ashley is considering removing him as DOF.

It's on twitter so it must be true XD
 
They know, that we know what everyone else in football knows that they'll come back empty handed.

Its a day trip on the p***.

The only way they'll be coming back with someone will be if their kidnapped in the back of the van, even that will be accidental.

Can just imagine them in 'The Only Fools and Horses' with JFK as Delboy and Pardew as Rodders.
 
I see Pardew reckons 1 signing & we are set? No worries about replacing Cabaye then? Still it takes us 9 months to replace star players Carroll, Ba etc...
 
Given Kinnear's history of getting players name's wrong (Insomnia), i'm frightened to see who he'd bring back from a trip abroad.
 
Beginning of window: Looking at 3-4 signings
Mid-window: 2 signings
Nearing end of window: 1 signing will do
End of window: Like a new signing...
 
Another loan deal?


Get French Football ‏@GFN_France 4m

Confirmed: We understand that ex-Lorient winger Innocent Emeghara has been offered to Newcastle on a season long loan from Siena. #FCL #NUFC
 

Hopefully not. With the state we're in we need players that are a bit more proven than those two.

Admittedly I know nothing about the two players mentioned in that article but we need a CF that is proven in a good quality league for me. We also need a quick winger and a replacement for Cabaye which probably means we're in for the two you've mentioned as they don't really fit the profile of what we need <laugh>

It really is a shambles that I'm reading reports today that a trasfer summit was held between JK, Ashley, Pardew & Carr last week. I mean the summit should have been held back at the end of May and the players should have been acquired no later than before our first game. I could understand if we got a couple in before the first game but were still waiting for say one deal to progress that dragged on slightly longer but it's just not the case.

I also have no idea how many players we'll sign before then window closes, with us it could honestly range from no players coming in to 3 or 4.
 
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