Off Topic The offical: Jokes THREAD
- Thread starter Garlic Klopp
- Start date
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My Grandma is 96 years old and still doesn't need glasses.
She drinks straight from the bottle....
She drinks straight from the bottle....
When my great-grandad went bald, he built a machine to weave himself a wig out of yarn
He then gave it to my grandad, who then gave it to my dad - and one day, it will be mine.
It’s our family hair loom.
He then gave it to my grandad, who then gave it to my dad - and one day, it will be mine.
It’s our family hair loom.
I keep randomly shouting out 'Broccoli' and 'Cauliflower' - I think I might have florets
My colleague can no longer attend next weeks Innuendo Seminar.
So I have to fill her slot instead.
So I have to fill her slot instead.
- If I want to know if it’s hot enough to remove my clothing at the beach,
- I’ll listen to the Stripping Forecast
'I saw on social media my cousin’s a bugler in the Army.
I liked his last post.'
I liked his last post.'
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My wife says she is leaving me because she thinks I'm obsessed with astronomy...........
What planet is she on?
What planet is she on?
I remember when I first started dating my wife, I got a hard-on just watching her eating a banana...
Now after ten years of marriage, I only get aroused if she starts choking on it!
Now after ten years of marriage, I only get aroused if she starts choking on it!
I went by the house where I grew up today and asked to go in to look around, but they said no and shut the door in my face...
My parents can be so rude!
My parents can be so rude!
If anyone wants to come and talk to me about my shoddy joinery work...
My door is always open.
My door is always open.