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United's match day squad cost them over £600m to assemble.

They have a further £250m or so not even in the squad.

Laughable.
Their team selection doesn't make much sense, though.
Back four, one proper midfielder, a couple of attacking midfielders and three wingers.
What's that supposed to be? Who's supposed to carry it forward or hold it up? Odd.
 
He’s gonna break a **** ton of records providing he don’t get injured.

Big ugly Viking is like a cheat code.
 
Thankfully he won’t be around the PL long enough to break the all time record but he will get 40 league goals this season if he stays fit.

If they don’t win the CL with him then they never will
 
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Thankfully he won’t be around the PL long enough to break the all time record but he will get 40 league goals this season if he stays fit.

If they don’t win the CL with him then they never will
They'll get to the semi-finals and Guardiola will drop him and play five at the back or something! <laugh>
 
Wolves have allegedly sacked Lage.
Not sure how Utd's performance prompted that, to be honest.