Jokes

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That's not maths it's the great beer bear, he probably wacked you round the head to cause the headache and threw all of your clothes around the floor, left some half eaten takeway on the lounge floor etc.
Think the big bastard was in the round with what I usually went through then....now where's that trap!
 
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Just had two police officers come up to me outside Aldi.
They asked me the following questions:
"Are you familiar with the letters HB?"
I said, "no i'm not"
"How about LS?"
"No"
"What about JD?"
I said, "hang on a minute, am I a suspect or something?"
They said, "no, these are just initial enquiries.
 
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BREAKING NEWS

The government have just announced that the economic recovery has officially started as sales of adult nappies have increased 10,000% in the Tyneside area following Fulhams win at Anfield this afternoon.
 
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