please log in to view this image Two countries Two differences in the size of Lizards. WTF am I doing living here........... please log in to view this image
Just had a letter from the Herb and Spice company saying I owe them £100. If I don't pay by tomorrow, they're sending the Bay Leaf’s around.
Morris returns from the doctor and tells his wife that the doctor has told him that he has only 24 hours to live. Given the prognosis, Morris asks his wife for sex. Naturally, she agrees, so they make love. About 6 hours later, the Morris goes to his wife and says, 'Honey, you know I now have only 18 hours to live. Could we please do it one more time?' Of course, the wife agrees, and they do it again. Later, as the man gets into bed, he looks at his watch and realizes that he now has only 8 hours left. He touches his wife's shoulder and asks, 'Honey, please... just one more time before I die.' She says, 'Of course, Dear,' and they make love for the third time. After this session, the wife rolls over and falls asleep. Morris, however, worried about his impending death, tosses and turns, until he's down to 4 more hours. Again he taps his wife, who rouses. 'Honey, I have only 4 more hours. Do you think we could...' At this point the wife sits up and says, 'Listen Morris, enough is enough I have to get up in the morning... you don't.'
Just got unfriended and blocked on Facebook by a French bloke. We were talking about sports history and he asked me who won the first Tour de France. Apparently the 5th Panzer Division was the wrong answer!
