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Off Topic Jokes thread

Discussion in 'Portsmouth' started by devonFRATTONiser, Jan 25, 2015.

  1. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Medical experts were asked if it is time to ease the lockdown.
    Allergists were in favor of scratching it, but Dermatologists advised not to make any rash moves.
    Gastroenterologists had sort of a gut feeling about it, but Neurologists thought the government had a lot of nerve.
    Obstetricians felt certain everyone was labouring under a misconception, while Ophthalmologists considered the idea shortsighted.
    Many Pathologists yelled, "Over my dead body!" while Paediatricians said, "Oh, grow up!"
    Psychiatrists thought the whole idea was madness, while Radiologists could see right through it.
    Surgeons decided to wash their hands of the whole thing and pharmacists claimed it would be a bitter pill to swallow.
    Plastic Surgeons opined that this proposal would "put a whole new face on the matter."
    Podiatrists thought it was a step forward, but Urologists were pissed off at the whole idea.
    Anaesthetists thought the whole idea was gas, and those lofty Cardiologists didn’t have the heart to say no.
    In the end, the Proctologists won out, leaving the entire decision up to the assholes.
     
    #14661
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  2. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #14662
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  3. Wooperts_duck

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    #14663
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  4. Wooperts_duck

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    #14664
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  5. Wooperts_duck

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    #14665
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  6. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    A thief has removed all motorway signs in Yorkshire.

    Police are currently looking for Leeds.....
     
    #14666
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  7. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    My mate was crying earlier and asked me to console him.

    So I smacked him on the head with my Xbox.....
     
    #14667
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  8. antipodean exile

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    #14668
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  9. antipodean exile

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    #14669
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  10. antipodean exile

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    #14670
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  11. antipodean exile

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    #14671
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  12. antipodean exile

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    #14672
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  13. antipodean exile

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    #14673
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  14. antipodean exile

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    #14674
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  15. antipodean exile

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    #14675
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  16. antipodean exile

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    #14676
  17. antipodean exile

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    #14677
  18. Wooperts_duck

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    #14678
  19. Wooperts_duck

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    #14679
  20. Wooperts_duck

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    #14680

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