Off Topic Jokes thread
- Thread starter devonFRATTONiser
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What do you call a small Jihadi ?
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- Drogba said that for him the turning point in the game was when his early penalty appeal was turned down after he dramatically threw himself to the ground. The referee had a point though, as the anthems were still being played.
Women are very strange creatures. They love lingerie and they love car boot sales.
Yet when I buy my wife some lingerie from the car boot sale for her birthday I suddenly turn into a useless, thoughtless b*stard.
Yet when I buy my wife some lingerie from the car boot sale for her birthday I suddenly turn into a useless, thoughtless b*stard.
- Why is Christmas like a day at work?
- Because you do all the work and some fat bastard in a suit gets all the credit!
- I went to a restaurant and ordered "soup of the day" for starters.
- The waiter brought the soup
- .Five minutes later, I called the waiter and said, "I can"t eat this!"
- The waiter said, "Sir, our chef has cooked the same soup, to the same recipe for the last 12 years and nobody has ever complained until now, why can"t you eat it?"
- I said, "because you didn"t bring me a spoon, you daft twat!"
- What do you call a woman who can spread her legs from one side of a tennis court to the other?
- Annette.
- My wife was telling her friend that obesity is in her genes.
- I was compelled to point out that wasn"t true as she looks like a fat cnut in a skirt as well.